BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Alberto del Rio was laying on his leather couch, with his feet up, laughing vigorously as his personal ring announcer held his PTG Championship in his hands. The Title read "CAMINO A LA GLORIA" in italics carved instead of the usual English words, he was not having English on his title belt, English was overrated, and not a romantic language. Alberto was wearing a crisp white suit while he was apparently being told a joke by his trustful compadre, Ricardo Rodriguez.
Alberto del Rio: You're killing me Ricardo! Isn't this some sort of April's fools joke?
Ricardo Rodriguez shook his head.
Ricardo Rodriguez: Señor, aqui dice clarito: Alberto del Rio Vs. Santino Marella, PTG championship match. (Sir, it says it here, crystal clear: ADR Vs. Santino)
Ricardo smiled a little.
Ricardo Rodriguez: Although it does sound funny! Santino Marella?
Alberto del Rio: The guy who marches down the ring and has a sock puppet on his arm? The man who sucks up to John Cena? The man who adds "esses" to "everythings" when he speaks?
Ricardo Rodriguez: Si señor! That is your number one contender.
Alberto del Rio: Get real! No wonder why Teddy Bear was champion for a year... I might as well get buried with the championship, eh?
The door swung open, Alberto sat up and Ricardo smile at the gorgeous personal assistant Alberto del Rio had hired. The beautiful and very capable Eve, like he theme song was looking good. She was wearing a black sundress and black glasses, her brown reddish hair falling just below her shoulderblades, she smiled at del Rio, who smiled back.
Alberto del Rio: My beautiful Eve, how are you doing this Evening?
Eve Torres: I'm fine Alberto, but we need to talk.
Alberto always had time for a beautiful girl like Eve. He smiled and nodded at her.
Alberto del Rio: Sure... What's wrong?
Eve Torres: Alberto, ever since you became Path To Glory champion...
Alberto cut her off.
Alberto del Rio: The world is a better place isn't it? Ahh! What a glorious night! We drank the finest tequila I had in my cava (Cellar), remember?
Eve Torres: Yes, it was delicious, but sometimes I think that 2 months later, you're still celebrating that win... I thought you wanted to win the rumble? To go to WrestleMania?
Alberto del Rio: I didn't win the rumble because no one wanted to take the 5 grand I offered per elimination, no one wanted to help me!
Eve Torres: Alberto, you're supposed to win the Royal Rumble match on your own...
Alberto del Rio: What about WrestleMania? As long as I am the champion I will be in the show, right?
Eve Torres: Yes. But have you considered that if you lose the title tonight there will be NO Alberto del Rio at WrestleMania?
Alberto's smiling, relaxed face slowly faded away.
Eve Torres: That's right Alberto...
Ricardo Rodriguez: So No RicardMania?
Alberto del Rio: Callate, Ricardo... Go change!
Ricardo stomped his feet on his way to the bathroom before disappearing behind the door.
Eve Torres: Alberto, you have to beat Santino tonight!
Alberto del Rio: Eve, Eve, bonita... I WILL beat Santino tonight... Once I BREAK that puppet cobra he carries around...
Eve Torres: EWWWWW he stores it in his pants!
Alberto del Rio: Right... Right! I shall lock the Cross Armbreaker in his other arm!
Eve Torres: You better... Gross! Anyway, Santino has been on a roll lately and he...
Alberto del Rio: PFFFFTTTTT....BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Alberto was covering his mouth, laughing loud.
Eve Torres: As I was saying, when you and Santino get in the ring...
Alberto del Rio: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Sorry Eve, I just find it too funny...
Eve Torres: I don't get what's so funny about...
Eve's shoulder was tapped. The camera panned out to show Ricardo, wearing a brown wig, a huge brown moustache draped over his eyebrows. He had scribbled on his skin with markers to mimic Santino's tattoos and was wearing a blue outfit like Santino's, Eve giggled a little.
Ricardino Marella: Scusi piccolina... Mi name is Ricardino Marella!
He moved on to kiss her on the forehead, before going eye to eye with Del Rio.
Ricardino Marella: You wan kno somthin' Aberto? I don likes you! And tonights I am going to make you witness the Cobra!
Alberto couldn't contain his laughter and nodded a little.
Alberto del Rio: Right.
Alberto patted Ricardino on the shoulder.
Alberto del Rio: Listen... Sant... I mean... Ricardino... Let's go through this nicely, okay? Do you need a comb for your eyebrows? Some soapy water for those ugly marker stains on your skin?
Ricardino Marella: what are you saying Aberto? Areyu lafins at my eyebro and tattoos? Do you know I am an italian stallion? Do you know what Imma gunnadutuyu when weget in the aring? Doyuno I was train to eat crap and crap lightn... Wait, what? Well you get the ideas!
Alberto chuckled, rather mockingly.
Alberto del Rio: Eat crap? Man, I don't like spaghetti or Canneloni, but calling them crap?
Ricardino Marella: shadap! yunot gonna tok about italian food! italian grub is dilishus! Not unlike those nachomachowashos you eat!
Alberto grabbed Ricardino by the attire he wore and pulled him in aggressively.
Alberto del Rio: Don't. You. Dare. Mocking. Nachos... Entiendes?
Alberto released him... Ricardino still looked angry and yelled at Alberto.
Ricardino Marella: Also, Enrique Iglesias sucks!
Alberto tried really hard not to laugh.
Alberto del Rio: I think Enrique Iglesias is from Spain!
Ricardino marched around Alberto, who held his stomach, which was aching from so much laughter. Ricardino marched furiously in circles before falling on his butt.
Ricardino Marella: I am dizzy...
Alberto del Rio: Look at you! You even fail at being an italian stereotype!
Marella looked like he was about to lose it, he jumped up and got back in del Rio's face.
Ricardino Marella: Alrights, you asked for this!
Ricardino slid his hands into his wrestling attire, dragging out a green fabric, he tugged on it, and tugged on it, and tugged on it... It didn't seem like a cobra but like an endless anaconda coming out of his trousers. Soon Ricardino was surrounded in green fabric... Alberto and Eve laughed at him.
Ricardino Marella: Ewwww.... what is that foul smells?
Ricardino sniffed on the green fabric and fainted from the foul smell of keeping something in his sweaty trousers for God knows how long... Alberto del Rio placed a foot over him and spread his arms wide.
Alberto del Rio: You see Eve? This Santino Marella guy is nothing but a walking... Wait, scratch that. He's a power walking, canelonni eating, English butchering, foul smelling Joke. And I, Alberto del Rio, El Campeon del Camino a la Gloria, am going to break his arm. You see Eve, I don't feel cobras, because cobras don't get near royalty. Cobras are actually mystic and wise creatures... If That "Cobra" Santino Marella talks about so much were a real cobra, it'd have no business with that italian moron... Tonight I step on a cobra.
Alberto smiled at Eve and shot her his trademark wink as the scene faded to black.
Ricardo Rodriguez: Ya me puedo parar? (Can I stand up now?)
-Scene fades.-
