Michelle Knows Best

[Kamden]

OOC: Here's my rp for Warfare, I think I screwed up the math in there by not including myself in the fraction.. But who needs math? Lol. Good luck everyone.


Hello! Over here? I’m not paying you to record the peeling, mildewed walls of this cheap ass school. You’re a real winner when it comes to picking out where we film, aren’t you? But I guess it’s better than being out in the cold.

Michelle was speaking to, or rather down on, her hired cameraman Paul. He was a local, and hadn’t had a job as big as this for years. It was a wonder she had even found and hired him. But so far, she wasn’t that impressed.

Michelle: So are you ready to start or what? I can’t be stuck here all day. I thought you knew what you were doing.

Paul: I do, I do miss. Sorry.

Michelle had to turn around to face the chalkboard and bit on her knuckle to keep from explaining herself. She was in character and didn’t mean what she was saying, but didn’t want to break the mood she was in. It was perfect. Instead, she let out a long-winded sigh and then turned around again to face the camera, her hands on her hips. She was wearing a blue generic basketball jersey, and black yoga pants with her trademark black moccasin boots down below. Her blonde hair was pulled up into a neat ponytail, and she had a black hairband to keep everything in place. She looked almost like a fashionable gym teacher, if any existed.

Michelle: Ready?

Paul shook his head yes and put a thumb up as he stood behind the tripod, looking at the camera’s pull out screen to see Michelle’s figure standing in front of the old-fashioned green chalkboard. Then he clicked a button on his video camera and a small beep was heard, and the recording began.

…


Michelle: Welcome! I'm Michelle McCool. But of course you already knew that.

She smiled and put up a hand in acknowledgment then turned slightly to motion at the chalkboard which had the title for the segment, "Michelle Knows Best", written at the top left corner. There were names neatly written in cursive on the board as well, but there was a large space left unmarked in the center. She clapped her hands together and once again faced the camera, that same smile still on her face.

Michelle: Well class, today we’ll be discussing my match on Warfare this Monday! I’ll be facing these four ladies.

She picked up a long wooden yardstick and traced an imaginary circle around the group of names.

Michelle: For those who can’t read, even though at this point if you can’t you’re stupid, these are the names of the little girls I’ll be going against: Eva Marie, Summer Rae, Mschif, and Eve.

Michelle stifled a laugh as she placed the yardstick down in the chalk tray at the bottom of the board, before picking up a piece of chalk to write with. She cleared her throat and wiped the smile off of her face before speaking.

Michelle: As you know, I’ve had 3 matches in the EBWF and have won all of them. That’s no surprise. But let’s not get off subject! I’m going to point out all of the reasons I’ll be winning this match, and why I’LL be the last lady to step into that ring at the Women’s Royal Rumble.

Take a good look and pay close attention, because I’m about to take ALL of you to school, figuratively speaking. But also literally speaking, because like I said I’m gonna win this match.

She took a few steps forward along the board and drew a star next to Eva Marie and Summer Rae’s names before pointing at them.

Michelle: See these two? They have stars by their names. Anyone care to take a guess why? Actually, don’t waste class time, I’ll just tell you. I’ve already beat their asses. They were seeing stars after I dropped them.

For once she didn’t laugh at one of her tasteless jokes. Teacher Michelle kept a straight face as she went on with her explanation.

Michelle: Ok, so that’s 2 out of 4 opponents down in my match. I mean, I beat them once so why can’t I beat them again? I’ve already got a 50% shot at winning. Not too bad!

She wrote out the fraction and the percentage in the untouched center of the board, leaving space below it to write more. Her eyes trailed down the list to the next name: Mschif.

Michelle: Umm, I don’t know who that is so I’ll just skip her and go to the next one.

She drew a line right through Mschif’s name.

Michelle: Oh, Eve Torres! I’m soooo scared!

With one swift motion she swiped the name off the chalkboard with her bare hand and dusted them off, powder clouding the air around her hands.

Michelle: And now she’s nothin’ to worry about. Not like she ever was anyway.

She nodded in approval at her assumption and walked to the other side of the chalkboard, her hands clasped together formally as she turned on her heel to face the camera.

Michelle: I don’t think I need to spell it out for you, but I’ll give you all the benefit of making things crystal clear. Considering I’ve already beat two of the people in this match, and the other two are just lucky to be on tv for once, I’m definitely going to win. There’s no argument there. Unlike those other wannabes in the locker room, I have a hunger for competition, I have a desire to be big in this company. I don’t give care about getting to being on tv! That’s easy for me to do. What’s not easy is being big. Being good. Even if I make it seem that way.

She rolled her eyes and started pacing the room, her footsteps echoing dully. One of the fluorescent lights flickered for a split second, but she ignored it. It wasn’t part of the act but it added dramatic effect.

Michelle: Just what are we gonna do about this, class? I think we need a new leader around here. Am I right?

There was silence as she waited for a response, but of course with no one in the room nothing was going to be said.

Michelle: I’ll leave this lesson on that note. Remember, Michelle Knows Best! You’re dismissed.

The warm and welcoming tone she had at the start of the video was lost long ago, and was now serious and unnerving. She took the eraser to the green board and started wiping away at the writing, and the video cut off.

--------------------

There was a mixed reaction from the crowd as EBWF Diva Michelle McCool and interviewer Michael Cole appeared on camera just outside the diva's locker room, Cole with his signature goofy grin and Michelle looking past him to the corridor just off screen. She was trying to look at anything but him. Despite Michael’s height, Michelle was still taller than him, but only barely. The beautiful blonde was in her favorite blue ring get up, ready for action. On top of her attire she was wearing a black plain black zip up with the hood up over her head, wavy blond locks spilling out from underneath. Her eyes were visible and it was clear she wasn’t too interested in what Michael was going to say.

Michael Cole: Hello EBWF universe! I am here at EBWF’S Sunday House Show in Bloomington, Minnesota with Michelle McCool, one of the company’s many recently signed talent. Michelle, would you like to comment on your current standing in the company?

Michelle: No thanks, Michael Cole.

He raised his eyebrows in surprise and looked down to his cue card, already baffled and forgetting what to ask next. This wasn’t what he expected.

Cole: Well… Ok! How about this, tomorrow on Warfare you’ll be in a five way bout for a chance to gain the highly prized advantage of entering last in the Women’s Royal Rumble. Anything to say about that?

Michelle was still looking off in the distance and sighed , letting her head fall to stare at the ground, one of her hand’s on her hip.

Michelle: Wow, that’s a decent question from Michael Cole! I’ve actually got a lot to say about that.

Cole nodded and held the mic up for her to speak, but instead she looked him up and down, her icy blue eyes practically burning a hole through him wherever they went.

Michelle: Aren’t you going to say anything about my opponents first Michael Cole? You really are a dunce.

He let the remark roll right off his shoulders.

Cole: Actually, I wasn’t Michelle. But can I ask why you keep saying my name every time you respond?

He had a look of content on his face, like he was getting special attention from the hot teacher in class while all the other classmates watched on with envy.

Michelle: You know, I think that’s the first time you’ve done something smart Michael Cole, even if you didn’t speak your mind directly. There’s no reason for you to discuss my opponents because there really is nothing to say about them. Summer Rae and Eva Marie have done nothing but lose since they got here, and let me remind you that it was by my hand in at least one of their matches. Then we have Eve and Mschif who have been out of the spotlight for some time and needed to be dragged out into the ring to dust off the cobwebs… But, as for me repeating your name so many times? That’s because I’m surprised I have an interview with you.

Cole: Really? Well, let me just say it’s an honor for me as well, getting to interview someone like you Michelle.

She wasn’t flattered. The diva was actually appalled, and the look of disgust on her face showed every bit of it.

Michelle: What? Oh HELL no! That is not how I meant it! I said that because I specifically asked the staff to not let you, Michael Cole, near me, to not talk to me, not to bother me, ANYTHING! You’re pathetic. And annoying. Give me that.

There was a little bit of laughter within the arena and a few mocking whistles as she snatched the mic from his hand and pushed him off scene, before standing a little closer to the camera to only have her upper body in the shot.

Michelle: Am I in a comedy club? Because this place is full of jokes! I’m getting a little impatient here. Thankfully my time to really shine is getting closer by the day. All I’ve done is rip apart everyone I’ve been against. I’m 3 for 3. Maybe that’s not something to brag about just yet, but it’s better than what most of these wannabes can say. I don’t know if anyone’s seen my latest video yet, but I suggest you watch it and take notes. Things are going to change around here very quickly for the Diva’s division. I’m not just some pretty little thing that gets thrown around… No, I’m the pretty little thing that DOES the throwing down. I’ve proved it before and I’ll prove it again tomorrow on Warfare.

I’ll put dogfaced Mschif on her leash and teach Eve a thing or two about how real athletes do things around here. Then I’ll bleed Eva Marie dry and break Summer Rae’s face AGAIN and earn my chance to walk right in on the night of the Royal Rumble and win that Women’s Rumble to top it all off. That’ll be a nice little post-birthday present for me, won’t it?

She smirked and let out a chuckle as she maintained eye contact with the camera. She was on a roll, talking herself up to be a bigshot, and she wasn’t afraid to show that she knew it.

Michelle: It’s a shame I’m pedaling to the top so early in my start here. Not for me, but for the others. Especially your Women’s “champion.” By the way, nice seeing you on camera again Angelina Love! Nice to see you finally come out of your hole only to shove around some failed backup dancer with your porky friend Ms. Piggy. Most call her Velvet Sky, but I think Ms. Piggy suits her cause everyone knows she is NOTHING like a pretty sunset you wanna wake up to in the morning.

She had to stop a moment to catch herself from saying anything more about the Beautiful People, putting a hand to her forehead and closing her eyes. Then she sighed and opened her eyes again before starting where she left off with a flare of sarcasm.

Michelle: What a headache. Anyway, that little stunt you pulled last week? Yeah, that’s REALLY impressive. I'm shaking in my boots over here! Just know that you won’t be hanging on to that gold for much longer. Lucky for you, you have that other tag title to cling to like a little kid and her Barbie doll, because that’ll be the only thing left keeping you in circulation. It’ll be like taking candy from a baby! The day you lose to me will be the day everyone starts bowing down to the true queen. Me.

She switched the mic from one hand to the other, and took a lock of hair into her fingers and twisted it around innocently.

Michelle: Sorry, looks like it’s time for me to go. I have to put on a show for the wonderful people of Bloomington now.

Her final statement lacked enthusiasm, and she scoffed. Without another word she tossed the microphone back over her shoulder in the direction of Michael Cole, and he caught it abruptly as the camera followed Michelle until she disappeared behind the famous black curtain to get in last minute prep for her match.

Michael Cole: My oh my, Michelle McCool is really building herself up. But is all of that big talk going to be backed up in her match? Be sure to catch Warfare tomorrow night live in Minneapolis in the opening contest and see for yourself! This match will be a great start to the show, don’t miss it!

After Cole’s closer, the scene faded into a commercial break.

[Jayme]

I enjoyed this roleplay a lot. I'm so sorry for my lack of time to RP, even with an extended deadline. Keep up the good work and I look forward to seeing where the ideas we've been bouncing around will take us. =)