Solomon.. NO.

[D.J]

What a return it had been for the 'People's Champ.' In just two matches The Rock had returned with a fire unlike anything we had ever seen from him. He looked as though he was back and ready to make a huge impact on the EBWF. With a victory over CM Punk and Edge, The Rock had earned the right to face Solomon Crowe at Christmas Eve of Destruction for the EBWF World Championship. Solomon Crowe had recently shocked the world when he came up with a victory over former reigning champion John Cena. The victory shook the foundation of the EBWF. Would it be a long reign for Crowe or would The Rock be able to make it a quick one month title reign for the upstart champion? One thing was for sure it was going to be a Christmas Eve to remember.

The scene opened up in complete darkness. The camera started on the floor and quickly panned up to the ceiling. It then came back down to the middle of the scene and a light popped on. The entire room was now illuminated and The Rock stood in the middle of the frame. He wore a nike zip up long sleeve shirt and black pants. The Rock was breathing heavily and had a look of intensity on his face. He paced back and forth in the room before he finally spoke.

The Rock: Finally.. finally... FINALLY The Rock has come back.. to the EBWF World Heavyweight Championship picture. You see The Rock has been waiting for days, weeks, months, YEARS to be back in the EBWF. Now he's here, he's back, The Rock standing in front of his millions and millions of fans, is back in the EBWF, and not only is he back, he's standing here.. as the number one contender for the EBWF World Heavyweight Championship.

The Rock paced back and forth before continuing.

The Rock: You see with everyday that passed by, The Rock felt as though he was wasting away. Movie after movie, take after take, line after line. The Rock was working, but he wasn't happy. You see the only time The Rock is truly happy is when he is in the middle of the People's ring doing EXACTLY what he does best, and that's laying the smack down on jabroni after jabroni, one by one, by damn one. That is what truly makes The Rock happy, that is what truly keeps The Rock at peace. These past 3 weeks, since The Rock has returned to the EBWF, have been the best weeks The Rock can remember. The Rock.. is home.

The Rock cracked a small smile.

The Rock: Though The Rock finally, feels truly home, The Rock finally feels truly ecstatic with his current direction. The is someone... NO.. something that continues to stand in The Rock's way of total bliss.. and that someone.. that something... is Solomon Crowe.

The Rock looked extremely intense as he stared into the camera.

The Rock: You see Solomon Crowe has something that The Rock wants. Solomon Crowe has something that The Rock needs and that is the EBWF World Heavyweight Championship. The Rock went through Edge he went through CM Punk to become the number one contender. So many people, coming up to The Rock saying that there was no way.. NO WAY.. that The Rock would ever get by Edge and CM Punk.. no way The Rock would ever find himself in this match with Solomon Crowe for the EBWF Title.. well The Rock hopes that those people have fun taking their own foot and inserting it directly into their mouths, because hereeeeee we are.

The Rock was fuming as he spoke.

The Rock: Solomon Crowe stands in front of The Rock's fans and he runs his mouth.

The Rock mocked Crowe.

The Rock: Rock.. you've never seen a champion like me.. you've never faced someone so dark.. so edgy.. I don't care about the norms.. I'm a bad ass.. I'm a tough guy... I wear eye liner... you can't beat me...Well you Green Day looking jabroni, The Rock says that you can spew all the nonsense that you want, you can try and scare The Rock, intimidate The Rock, with your careless attitude. You can try to trick The Rock into thinking that HE is in fact the underdog, but the fact still remains. You.. are Solomon Crowe.. and you are about to go ONE....ON.... ONE... with the great one, and that is something that you've never experienced in your entire worthless little career. You are out of your league.. swimming in the deep end with the sharks.. and you are about... to get bit!

The Rock shook his head thinking about Crowe.

The Rock: You see Solomon, The Rock is on to you. Yeah.. The Rock gets what you're trying to do. Week after week you come into The Rock's ring, and you play a part. Yeah.. you play the part of the upstart, the guy who wants EVERYONE to think that he's missing a few screws, thus making him extremely dangerous. Well The Rock says, you are missing a few screws, that part isn't an act. The Rock says you're missing a few screws, and you're crazier than The Rock even thought, if you think you have an ant's chance in a parade of beating The Rock on Christmas Eve. You see Solomon the second you became the EBWF Champion you became a marked man. The second you pinned John Cena.. ONE... TWO.. THREE. Your whole life changed, and not for the better Solomon.. oh no no no NO.. not for the better, because the second you became the EBWF World Champion you became the guy that everybody was coming after. You became the guy that would soon be under all the heat, all the pressure. You became somebody that you simply aren't ready to be. You see Solomon, you beat John Cena.. congratulations.. good for you... but though that may have been the proudest moment of your life, it also may have been the worst thing that could have ever happened. That victory over John Cena was NOT the springboard to stardom that you thought it might be.. that victory over John Cena was the beginning of the end. You are standing on the tracks now Solomon and the train is coming in..

The Rock made a couple train horn sounds.

The Rock: The train is coming in, and you aren't moving.. NO you stand there.. proud.. you stand there tall.. thinking that because you beat John Cena that you can beat anybody. That because you beat John Cena you can stand on those tracks and NOTHING can harm you. Well The Rock is here to tell you Solomon Crowe that that is JUST not the case. Because this freight train will hurt you.. this freight train known as the brahma bull, The Rock, will do more than hurt you.. this freight train known as the people's champ The Rock.. will end you to become the EBWF World Heavyweight Champion.

The Rock stared dead into the camera.

The Rock: The Rock isn't stupid Crowe, he's not dumb, he knows that you can go. The Rock knows that you are a force to be reckoned with. The Rock isn't going to sit here and say that a victory over you will be easy. You don't become the EBWF World Heavyweight Champion because you're good at kickball, you become the EBWF World Heavyweight champion because you are capable of bringing it.. but you see Solomon there is nobody.. AND THE ROCK MEANS.. nobody that brings it at the level of The Rock. There is nobody that when the lights are on, the fans are chanting, the world is talking, that can lace em up and bring all the fury, all the intensity, all the relentlessness that The Rock brings. You see Solomon, no matter what you claim to have gone through in your life, there is NOTHING that is going to prepare you for The Rock. There is nothing that you've experienced that is going to ready you for what it's going to be like on Christmas Eve, December 24th, when you're looking across the ring with your mascara covered eyes, at the People's Champ. You are going to know in that moment Solomon that you are in the ring with someone that is truly better. You are going to know in that moment, that being the EBWF Champion is something that is an honor, it's something that is a privilege, it's something that SOME people get to experience, but it's not something that all people SHOULD experience. It's not for everybody, and quite frankly as sure as The Rock is standing here, he can confidently say that being the EBWF World Heavyweight Champion is just... NOT... for you.

The Rock smiled again.

The Rock: You don't care what The Rock thinks, and The Rock knows that, he respects it... but if you hear one thing that The Rock says.. hear this.. There is NO shame in being the EBWF Champion if even more a fleeting moment. There's only a small handful of guys that can even say that.. period. It's a world that you aren't ready for, a world you should have never entered, a world that after Christmas Eve, you will never have to be in.. ever again. The Rock is worried for you Solomon, he's concerned, because though it is blatantly obvious to The Rock, and to everyone else, that you aren't a worthy EBWF Champion, The Rock can tell that you THINK that you are deserving. The Rock can tell that you THINK that you are going to beat The Rock at Christmas Eve. The Rock can see that you THINK that you being the EBWF Champion is going to last forever. Though this kind of makes The Rock feel like he's telling a little kid that there's no santa, The Rock feels obligated to give you a little dose of reality. You see Solomon, you AREN'T deserving, you AREN'T going to beat The Rock, and your title reign isn't going to last forever, in fact it isn't going to last the rest of this WEEK.. and though you think The Rock is wrong when he says that, there's just that one little nagging thing that keeps going to The Rock's mind.. and that is the simple fact.. that The Rock wipes a PANDA BEAR'S ASS with what you THINK.

The Rock paced once more.

The Rock: You see The Rock can't stand guys like you. Guys who come in, and have some quick flash in the pan success and act like their shit don't stink. Guys that come in, win a couple of matches right from jump street, and think that their career is made. You see Solomon, it takes time. Days, weeks, months, YEARS to truly make it in this business. Just because you look down on your flabby ghost pale waist and you see the EBWF World Heavyweight Championship doesn't mean you've made it. It doesn't mean that you've arrived.. and quite frankly if you think that it does, The Rock says you are in for a rude awakening, The Rock says you are in for a bigger surprise than your parents received the night you were born. You see that was a long night for mama Crowe. Pushing, pounding away in labor. Hour after hour.. until finally you were born. The doctor pulled you out, they cut the cord and mama Crowe was relieved.. she was happy. She said "phew... I'm glad that's over.. what do we have a boy or a girl?"

The Rock paused for effect.

The Rock: To which the doctor replied.. "I'm afraid it's not that simple.".... "Well what do you mean?"... "Well what I mean is.. he looks like a boy..."

The Rock looked down at his crotch area.

The Rock: "For the most part.. we think it's a boy.. but it's just his eyes.. his eyes look like.. they seem like... oh hell Mrs. Crowe your little boy wants to put on eye liner in the worst way.. you've given birth to a little fairy."

The Rock paced again, stopped, and continued.

The Rock: "Oh dear." Mrs. Crowe replied, " The last thing I wanted is to give birth to a make up wearing little fairy boy.. this is terrible, I wish he'd never been born!" A thought, a sentiment, that you too will feel this Sunday, Solomon. You see after Sunday when The Rock gets done kicking your candy ass all over Christmas Eve of Destruction, you too will wish you'd never been born. You too are going to wish that mama Crowe never pushed you out, and that you'd never grown to see a bottle of eye liner or an ounce of blush. You are going to wish you'd become a hair dresser, or a photographer, or even the guy that picks up elephant shit at the zoo, you are going to wish that you were literally ANYONE but you. Because come Sunday Night, you, Solomon Crowe, are going to be the least envied man on god's green earth, because you Solomon Crowe are going to be the guy standing across from The Rock, you Solomon Crowe, are going to be the guy that tries to enforce your will on someone who will never.. and won't EVER back down... and because you Solomon Crowe are going to be the GUY that gets the ass kicking of a lifetime at Christmas Eve of Destruction.

The Rock paused.

The Rock: Solomon, twas the night before Christmas and all through the house.. not a creature was smiling.. not even Solomon.. when we bought him a blouse. The costumes won't matter at this, your big WRESTLING RECITAL.. because you are going to get jingle bell ROCKED by the great one.. and he's damn sure going to TAKE.. your.. TITLE. Sleep tight.. champ.

The Rock raised an eyebrow as the scene faded to black. We reopened at an EBWF house show back stage. Michael Cole seemed to be going through some things in his head, as finally The Rock walked into the scene. He wore a shirt that read "Team Bring It" on it, and black and white track pants. Michael Cole tried to open the conversation.

Michael Cole: Rock R...

The Rock held a hand up to Michael Cole which got a huge pop from the capacity crowd at this house show.

The Rock: Michael.. stop... before you start.. stop.. STOP.. and listen.. because they are chanting his name..

"ROCKY ROCKY ROCKY"

The Rock: They are chanting his name because they know.. and they are excited.. to hear and to see that FINALLY... THE ROCK.. HAS COME BACK TO KANSAS CITY!

The crowd erupted in cheers.

The Rock: But you see Michael, The Rock's opponent at Christmas Eve of Destruction knew The Rock was going to say that. Michael, Solomon Crowe is facing a psychic. He's facing someone who called The Rock predictable. The Rock predictable do you believe that.. do you think The Rock is predictable?

Michael looked at The Rock with a knowing glance. He knew he shouldn't answer, but seemed to not be able to help himself.

Michael Cole: Well I don't k..

The Rock: IT DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU THINK THE ROCK IS PREDICTABLE!

The crowd erupted.

The Rock: So the Rock is predictable.. The Rock's not predictable it doesn't really matter.. because Solomon Crowe, The Rock isn't trying to shock you. The Rock isn't trying to sneak up on you, he's not trying to perform a magic trick or an illusion. What The Rock is trying to do.. is beat your monkey ass up and down Mizzou.. and take that EBWF World Heavyweight Championship right off your little rinky dink waist.. and that is EXACTLY what he's going to do. The Rock heard Solomon Crowe all week RUNNING his mouth about how Wednesday Night won't be about t-shirts, it won't be about catchphrases, it'll be about who's tougher, it'll be about who wants it more. Well The Rock says, that's something that someone who can't sell a t-shirt, and doesn't have 3 brain cells to rub together to come up with a catchphrase would say. Solomon, this little act of coming out of nowhere to shock the EBWF will wear off eventually.. as a matter of fact..consider Wendesday Night to be... EVENTUALLY. You see The Rock DOES sell t-shirts.. The Rock DOES have a lot of catch phrases, but make no mistake about it The Rock STILL is tougher.. The ROCK STILL wants this match more than you do.. and The Rock.. WILL win it. Now Michael Cole did you have a question for The Rock or not?

Michael Cole went to answer but got no words out.

The Rock: Oh shut your mouth jabroni, before you even open it.. close it. Something you clearly need to do around a bag of Doritos. You see Michael The Rock is in no mood. The Rock is no mood for your little, roody poo questions. In fact The Rock is going to do the whole interview himself, so get the hell out of here.

Michael Cole just stood there.

The Rock: You heard The Rock.. go on weeble wobble away from The Rock.. you aren't needed here.

The crowd cheered and laughed at Cole as he put his head down and did as he was told. Another "Rocky" chant broke out. The Rock took one step over to the left. He changed his voice to a tone that suggested he was a news anchor.

The Rock: "So Rock, what are your thoughts on this Wednesday's Match with Solomon Crowe for the EBWF World Heavyweight Title?"

The Rock took a step to the right, he was now himself again.

The Rock: That is just an outstanding question, and might I add that you are extremely handsome and dare I say... electrifying in your role of being a broadcast journalist.

The Rock took a step back to the left.

The Rock: "Why thank you Rock, and might I say that you are equally as handsome and electrifying in your role of champion of the people and ass kicker of jabroni's like Solomon Crowe."

The crowed cheered. The Rock took a step back to the right.

The Rock: That's kind of you to say.. and The Rock will tell you exactly what he thinks of this match vs. Solomon Crowe. You see The Rock has been through it all in this business. As Solomon Crowe was so adept in pointing out The Rock has been in the ring with the Hogans, the Nashes, The Stone Cold Steve Austin's, The Triple H's, the list goes on and on, The Rock has faced them all, The Rock has BEAT them all. So what in the world does this kid think is going to be ANY different when The Rock goes up against him? Solomon Crowe says The Rock is old, that The Rock is washed up, that The Rock is overrated that he's beatable.. well to that The Rock says to Solomon Crowe... why don't you come and try and beat The Rock?

The crowd cheered as The Rock stared into the camera, daring Solomon Crowe to try and prove his words are in fact the truth.

The Rock: You see Solomon Crowe, you talk a big game, you may have a couple of Charlie Manson esque followers that are drinking your koolaid, but The Rock is NOT one of them. The Rock isn't drinking your koolaid, The Rock ISN'T picking up what you are putting down.. The Rock IS going to lay the smack down on your candy ass... then DRINK some koolaid.. stare at his newly won EBWF Title.. and say... "OHHHH YEAHH..."

The crowd cheered Rock remained stone faced. He pantomimed crashing through a wall.. before he once again imitated the Koolaid man.

The Rock: OHHHH YEAHHHHH..

The crowd cheered again.. another "Rocky" chant.

The Rock: You see Solomon Crowe, no matter how much you try and convince yourself that you are game enough for The Rock. No matter how much you try and tell yourself "you beat John Cena.. so you can beat The Rock." Doesn't make it anymore true. You see Solomon Crowe, The Rock is not John Cena. The Rock is The Rock.. and there's only ONE Rock.. and that ONE Rock is better than ONE Solomon Crowe everyday of the week and twice on Sunday's! John Cena is not the gauge you should be using when you ask yourself if The Rock is beatable. The Rock is not beatable, especially not for you. The Rock is a pie eating.. lalalala.. jabroni beating.. trail blazing, eye brow raising, always put on a show too good to not kick the crap out of Solomon Crowe, and he's the soon to be EBWF World Heavyweight Champion.

The Rock took a step back to the left.

The Rock: "So you are very confident going into this match?"

The Rock took a step back right.

The Rock: My god you are insightful.. and great.. the body of a greek god.

The Rock stepped back the other way.

The Rock: Could say the same about you, god damn you are great, the best of the best.. it's no wonder that both of us have literally.. millions...

"AND MILLIONS"

The Rock: Of fans that love us, millions of fans that support us. Millions of fans that know certain truth's. One of those truth's is that Solomon Crowe being the EBWF Champion, is nonsense. It's twilight zone, it's something that just can't be.. it's something that just WON'T be after Christmas Eve. You see on Christmas Eve The Rock is going to let Solomon Crowe open his gift from The Rock early. Did you want to know what The Rock got Solomon Crowe for christmas?

The Rock stepped back over to the interview side.

The Rock: "More than anything Rock."

The Rock stepped back to his side.

The Rock: Well good because The Rock planned on telling you anyway. You see Christmas Eve is going to come, and Solomon Crowe is going to be excited. He's had a great year, he's got signed by a wrestling company that doesn't pay him in monopoly money, he's bathing for the first time in a decade or so, he can afford oodles of noodles now, great year big win.. yayyy.. and to make it even better it's Christmas. The most wonderful time of any year. Everybody's happy.. glee fills the air. The Rock is going to walk down the ramp, gift in hand, slide into the people's ring and give that gift to Solomon Crowe. His eyes are going to light up.. he might even cry.. mascara running down his fat little face as he unwraps the gift. Bow first, wrapping paper second, he really will go at it without question, imagine his surprise that when he opens the gift he simply sees The Rock's boot. He'll be really confused because he will have just watched the Rock walk down the ramp with both of his boots firmly tied on The Rock's feet, he'll wonder how The Rock got the boot from foot to inside the gift so fast.. and while he wonders all of this, and before he even figures it out The Rock will give him part two of his gift, by proceeding to take that boot and stick it straight up his candy ass!

The crowd cheered again, they were loving this.

The Rock: You see Solomon, you just aren't getting it. You just don't seem to grasp the situation that you are in here. The Rock is a class in himself. He is a MAN that is FIT to be the EBWF World Heavyweight Champion. Solomon Crowe, you can be a lot of things in this world. You can be an artist, a poet, a drive through worker at Chic-Fil-A but you will not be the EBWF World Heavyweight Champion after Wednesday Night. All week people have asked The Rock if Solomon Crowe has any chance of retaining the World Heavyweight Championship on Christmas Eve.. well to those people The Rock simply says.. Solomon...........NO.

IF YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SAAAAAAMELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

WHAT THE ROCK....

IS COOKIN.'

The Rock cocked an eye brow and walked off as the crowd gave him a huge pop, before the next match of the house show kicked off.