We're Coming For You.

[Ben M]

The first Warfare of 2015 was underway, and the match between Bray Wyatt and Daniel Bryan had just taken place. The camera cut to the backstage area of the American Airlines Center, where Ryback was seen sitting in his locker room. Ryback had a laptop in front of him and he appeared to be reading something. He laughed as he read. A moment later, Wade Barrett entered the locker room. As he looked across at Ryback and saw the laptop in front of him, he seemed confused.

Wade Barrett: When did you learn how to use a laptop?

Ryback’s fingers could be heard as he pressed each keyboard key almost too loudly, it was a miracle the keyboard was still working after all the heavy duty typing he made punching in http://www.wikipedia.org. Ryback let out bursts of his irritable, loud, mocking laughter as he amused himself with the contents of the website he was checking out.

Ryback: Oh shit, don’t tell me I look like Cody Rhodes in a weightlifting room.

Barrett seemed confused by Ryback’s curious choice of words.

Wade Barrett: I wouldn’t know, I’ve never seen Cody Rhodes in a weightlifting room… he’s too busy painting his face gold most of the time. What are you doing?

Ryback: Well, remember you are always telling me I am the one who does the heavy lifting, and of course, you can come up with that conclusion the moment you look at my guns! I wanted to go further and, to quote you… “Do my homework”. After all, our next match is important. Not as important as feeding 6 times per day, but yeah. So, I was checking the EBWF Title history… I always thought the EBWF Tag Team Titles were a joke, now I had confirmed it.

Barrett nodded.

Wade Barrett: Well The Miz is one half of the champions, that’s enough to make any title seem like a joke… but if we beat Stardust and Adam Rose, we can make the Tag Titles mean something again.

Ryback: Yeah, right… Queen’s man.

Ryback’s baby blue eyes raised from the monitor to look at his tag partner, chuckling a little. Barrett raised his eyebrows in surprise.

Ryback: Wade Barrett and Sheamus… The queen’s men. Says it right here!

Ryback turned the laptop around so that the screen faced Barrett, and pointed out Barrett’s previous Tag Title reign with Sheamus. Barrett sighed and shook his head.

Wade Barrett: That was a long time ago, Ryback. I was a different person back then…

Ryback: And you hung out with the Wendy’s girl on steroids. HA! HA! HA! Anyway, I didn’t even know Starburst and Axl Rose were a tag team. Scratch that, I didn’t even know Axl Rose wrestled, sumo wrestling maybe? HA! HA! HA!.

Wade Barrett: It’s Adam Rose, Ryback. No relation to Axl, as far as I know. He’s something of a party animal… used to hang out with a giant bunny. Haven’t really seen much of him, I didn’t even know he was still on the roster until I saw he was due to face us. I’m not sure why he’s teaming with Stardust though. My best guess is that Goldust wasn’t available.

Ryback: Goldust? Who’s that, a hooker?

Wade Barrett: I hope not.

Barrett shuddered at the thought. The door of their locker room swung open and in came EBWF always forgotten nerdy looking announcer, Todd Grisham. Ryback scanned the skinny physique of the man who had just entered the room.

Ryback: Now I know what Tyler Breeze feels when he looks at ugly people. What do you want, NERD?

Grisham looked genuinely intimidated by Ryback’s aggressive greeting. He visibly gulped before responding.

Todd Grisham: H-hi Ryback, Wade. I just wanted to ask you a few questions about your match tonight?

Ryback looked at Grisham with disgust.

Ryback: No wonder why no one gets interviewed by you anymore. What is there to be asked? We are going to destroy Guns n Roses, KISS, whatever name they’re going by!

Ryback had got to his feet at this point, and Barrett looked across at him.

Wade Barrett: Give him a break, Ryback… he’s just doing his job. Ask away, Todd.

Ryback: I’ll give him a break alright… Do you want me to break your face?

Ryback snarled right in front of Todd, but Barrett gently pushed Ryback aside. Grisham directed his first question to Barrett, suggesting he felt less intimidated by him. He didn’t seem willing to look Ryback in the eye.

Todd Grisham: Wade, tonight marks your first match teaming with Ryback since the two of you were the sole survivors for your team at Survivor Series in your match against Team Punk. However, you and Ryback have the advantage of experience, given that your opponents tonight, Adam Rose and Stardust, are teaming together for the first time. How confident are you of a victory tonight? Do you think experience could be the difference-maker in this match?

Wade Barrett: Todd, Ryback and I are confident of victory for a number of reasons… being more experienced as a tag team is just one of them. I mean for starters, look at us. Ryback is a behemoth, and I’m a former champion bareknuckle boxer. We’re bigger than Adam Rose and Stardust, and we’re tougher than them too. Stardust is crazy, which can be a game-changer, and he was impressive in his match against Bray Wyatt at Christmas Eve of Destruction. But I guarantee you, Ryback is crazier, and if Stardust tries to play any mind games with us tonight, Ryback… well, let’s just say he won’t respond well.

Ryback: Yeah, you can tell by my arms I never eat candy but I can chew and spit starburst just for the fun of it. Also Wade, is behemoth a hungry, dangerous, mother####er who wants to dec… Decem… Des… Estimate ‘em all?

Wade Barrett: I think what Ryback is trying to say is that if you underestimate me, I’ll decimate you. Right, Ryback?

Ryback: Yeah, a couple of meathooks to their faces would do. I mean, have you seen these chumps? Bet they skip EVERY DAY at the gym. I mean, we single handedly took down Team Punk, not that they were huge adversaries, but still… We made it look pretty damn easy! I don’t know what makes these two think they actually stand a chance against… What are we, Obama’s men?

Wade Barrett: We don’t need a fancy name. We’re Wade Barrett and Ryback.. that’s all that matters.

Ryback: Thought we were Ryback and Wade Barrett, but it’s the same right? Not like I’m your b#### or anything?

Barrett smirked.

Wade Barrett: Right. It’s the same. We’re equals. I just think “Wade Barrett and Ryback” sounds better than “Ryback and Wade Barrett” is all.

Todd Grisham: Wade, Ryback… you’ve talked a lot about Stardust, but what are your thoughts on the “Party Animal”, Adam Rose? Stardust has been a more prominent superstar since he joined EBWF and he’s currently the Breakout Champion. Adam Rose, on the other hand, is something of an unknown quantity. Does that make him an easier opponent to deal with, or a more difficult opponent?

Ryback: Animal? He doesn’t look like an animal to me… for God’s sake he talks about roses and sucks on a lollipop in between stupid statements about being a rosebud! Well, tonight imma step all over his rose garden and I’m going to take a dump all over it, show him who’s boss! HA! HA! HA!

Wade Barrett: I wouldn’t say he’s an unknown quantity, Todd. I know all I need to know about him - that he’s more focused on parties than he is on his wrestling career. That’s why you haven’t seen much of him in EBWF, that’s why he’s inferior to Ryback and me, and that’s why we’ll beat him.

Todd Grisham: Assuming you do beat Adam Rose and Stardust, you’ll be the number one contenders for the Tag Team Titles and you’ll get the opportunity to take on the current champions, Edge and The Miz. The Miz replaced Randy Orton as one half of the Tag Team Champions in September, after Orton picked up an injury at Summerslam, but the team that call themselves “Rated Awesome” have yet to defend the gold. If you are the first team they defend the titles against, do you think you can become the new champions?

Ryback: Rated Awesome? More like Rated Lame! HA! HA! HA!

Wade Barrett: Of course we can become the new champions. Personally, I think it’s unacceptable that The Miz was able to replace Orton as champion, because he sure as hell didn’t earn it. I actually respect Edge, but The Miz is a pathetic excuse for a tag team partner, and a poor replacement for Randy Orton. Ryback and I are a formidable force, Todd… if Randy Orton hadn’t been injured, I know Ryback and I would have been the ones to end Rated RKO’s reign as champion. It would have been a challenge, but we would have overcome that challenge. With Miz in Orton’s place, it’s not a challenge… it’s inevitable that we’ll win. So Edge, Miz, be warned - we’re coming for you.

Todd Grisham: Wade, Ryback, thank you for your time, and good luck in your match tonight.

Grisham exited the locker room as the scene drew to a close.