Opposites

[Clover]

//CJ Parker courtesy of Tony.

Tyler Breeze could be described as a rising star within the ranks of the EBWF. Although he failed to qualify for the Elimination Chamber match, he made an impressive showing for himself in the Royal Rumble and picked up the biggest win of his career over mutli-time champion Ted DiBiase. There didn't seem to be anything that could shake the ridiculously good looking young man's confidence. No matter what happened, he was always going to be the most gorgeous man in the entire locker room. Not that this was at all difficult. He knew it and everyone else did as well. Heading towards his locker room, wearing a striped, blue and purple, fuzzy hooded jacket, the King of Cuteville took a few selfies with his phone and each one was more beautiful than the last. But something was blocking his path. A usual annoyance. He huffed and rolled his eyes.

Tyler Breeze: Can I PLEASE get some security over here?

The disturbance was a handful of screaming female fans. Tyler wasn't even concerned with how they got in and made it so far through the arena. When you were a world famous super model, these type of things happened all the time. Beefy men in black shirts soon hit the scene to escort the ladies away and Prince Pretty rolled his eyes at what her perceived as incompetence.

Tyler Breeze: Uh. Yeah. What if one of them actually touched me? Idiots.

With a scoff, Tyler entered the locker room. He had planned on making it to his own, extravagant room so he could be alone in soak in his perfection but there was something else blocking his path. Or rather someone. A pile of dreadlocks made the model's lips curl up in dismay. CJ Parker. He stood directly in the middle of the room and stared right in Tyler's direction. Tyler, however, kept a noticeable space between them

Tyler Breeze: Can you go somewhere else? Maybe the showers? You smell.

CJ Parker: No. I won't. I will not be moved. I'm like a mighty red wood. I can't be chopped down.

Tyler Breeze: What? What does that even MEAN? Go away, uggo. I have a match to prepare for.

CJ Parker: You mean..we have a match to prepare for.

Tyler Breeze: My match isn't against you. I have a Tag Team Title match against Ryback and Barrett. I don't know who my partner is yet but..

Tyler's eyes grew wide. The revelation had stuck him.

Tyler Breeze: Oh god. Oh god. Please no.

CJ Parker: That's right. I'M your partner.

CJ nodded, his long dreads swaying with the motion. Tyler backed all the way towards nearby wall and dramatically placed a hand over his heart.

Tyler Breeze: ..I'm going to..I'm going to be sick..

CJ Parker: You need to pull yourself together! This is my opportunity to become a champion! I can bring more attention to my cause! I don't intend to go out there and lose!

Tyler Breeze: And what exactly is your cause? Huh? To go your entire life without ever touching a bar of soap?

A wry grin appeared on Tyler's face and the hippie stepped closer to him with a scowl. Like a turtle, Tyler tugged his hood over his head and sunk lower against the wall.

Tyler Breeze: Stay back! Don't touch me! I'm too pretty!

CJ began to point his finger towards Breeze who ducked and weaved to avoid even the slightest bit of contact.

CJ Parker: I'm not fighting for you. I'm fighting for Mother Earth. Bad News Barrett used to come out on that huge podium. Do you have any idea how much electricity that wasted?! He's a monster. An absolute monster. And Ryback? All that meat he consumes? How many cows do you think that takes to regularly feed him? He's a beast. For their crimes against nature, they have to be made to pay.

Tyler slowly peeked out from under his hood.

Tyler Breeze: Let me tell you something about Ryback and Barrett. I've defeated Ryback, understand? He was so afraid, he got himself counted out. In fact, I led both of them to victory at the Survivor Series. It was MY team and they only won because of my gorgeous marching orders. I know all about them. So just stand on the apron and try to distract with your odor. That's all I need you for! Because to tag you I would have to touch you and that is NOT happening!

Both men, who could not be anymore different in just about every aspect shot daggers at one another.

CJ Parker: You don't want to tag me? You think you can become a champion alone? You think you can beat Ryback and Barrett by yourself? You don't want to fight for a REAL purpose?

Tyler Breeze: No, yes, yes, and NO.

With a smirk, CJ reached out and slapped Tyler on the shoulder.

CJ Parker: Tag.

Tyler looked as though he were going to melt and he recoiled in horror, looking to CJ and then his shoulder in disbelief.

Tyler Breeze: Did..did..DID YOU JUST TOUCH ME?! Did you touch me you filthy uggo?!

CJ Parker: Get over it! You want some gold? That's how it's going to be!

Seething, Tyler plucked a can of hair spray from his jacket pocket and looked at it with piercing eyes. CJ took a step back and held out his palm.

CJ Parker: Don't do it, man. Don't do it. Think about this.

The model turned wrestler shook up the can and sprayed a generous amount onto his blonde locks and then straight into the air. CJ looked as though his entire world had crumbled before his eyes

CJ Parker: No! NO! Do you understand how much damage you're doing to the o-zone layer right now?! DO YOU!?

Tyler Breeze: Do I look like I care?

They both at a stand off now. Two different worlds, two different life styles that were being forced to come together for a common goal. The hateful looks grew all the more intense

CJ Parker: Listen to me and listen well. Do you want to be a champion?

Tyler Breeze: I already am I champion. A champion of really good looking people everywhere.

CJ Parker: A wrestling champion, you idiot! Gold! Titles! Belts! Do you want that?!

Tyler Breeze: Obviously.

Tyler responded in his most stuck up tone, giving a smug look.

CJ Parker: So do I. If I become a champion, everyone will have to listen to my message. My message of peace and a greener, better Earth. And if you win..

Tyler Breeze: ..It's a victory for every GORGEOUS man, woman and child.

CJ Parker: Right. Whatever. See, we're both fighting for a purpose. Different reasons. Mine is important, yours is superficial and shallow--

Tyler Breeze: --Pft!

CJ Parker: --But a purpose still! What kind of purpose do you think Ryback and Barrett have? What kind?

Tyler Breeze: ..To eat a lot of food while looking as hideous and bald as possible? And..to have the world's most crooked nose and a stupid, gravely voice that sounds like UGLY?

The Moonchild squinted his eyes in confusion. This was not the answer he was expecting.

CJ Parker: ..R-Right! No purpose! For our respective goals, we bond together! We unite! We. Become. Champions!

CJ stuck out his hand for Tyler to shake. The model gasped. He expected to touch him again? Reluctantly, he reached out and gave the warrior of peace the quickest handshake of all time and quickly jerked his hand away. He stared at his palm in horror, as if expecting it to rot off and fall apart at any moment.

Tyler Breeze: ..And..we keep..as far..away from each other..as possible. We defeat Barret and Ryback..and stay..away. You stay in your stupid hybrid hippie mobile, and keep away from me.

CJ Parker: Agreed.

The reluctant partners backed away but still faced one another, both watching the others every move extremely carefully. CJ to meditate on the encounter and Tyler to scrub every inch of dirt off of his hand.