WE. ARE. BACK.

[Skyler]

The dwelling of The Ascension. A lot of red. A lot of skulls. A lot of other bad ass looking shit that only real tough guys have surrounding them. Konnor, the larger bruiser of a team of bruiser's, sat on a black, totally rad leather sofa and crushed the remote he held within his powerful grasp.

Konnor: THIS. IS. BULLSHIIIIIIIIIIT!

Viktor stepped into the room and it was clear that he was on the same wave length as his partner. Anger. Frustration.

Viktor: THIS. IS. GAAAAAAAAAAY!

Konnor: Viktor! That is a poor choice of words!

Viktor: I realize that! I apologize for my actions! The Ascension has nothing but respect for the LGBT community!

Konnor: YEAAAAAAAAAH!

Viktor: But it doesn't change the fact that we haven't been on television since the King of the Ring!

Viktor grasped onto the sides of the flat screen television that Konnor had been watching and tossed it straight into a wall. Normally Konnor would be angry because COPS was on but he understood the grave nature of this situation. He sprung from his chair.

Konnor: Let's rectify this! Let's go to the site of this week's Warfare and kick someone's ass! Let's beat the living hell out of the first person we see!

Viktor: YEEEEEEEEEAHHHHH!!!!!

This prompted The Ascension to ride into the Legacy Arena on their hellhound Motorcycles. They were in their full ring gear because they were always in their full ring gear. They stormed through the hallways and the first person they came across was Todd Grisham.

Todd: Oh, hello, The Ascens--GRAAAAAH!

A beating ensued. Todd was pummeled by collecting meaty fists.

Konnor: Watch me whip!

Viktor: Watch me nae nae!

The Ascension: BOP! BOP! BOP! BOP! BOP!

Todd was a quivering mess at their feet and he began to wonder just what he had done to ever deserve such an attack. They stood over him like proud lions who had just slaughtered a deer.

Konnor: THIS WILL CONTINUE TO HAPPEN UNTIL WE ARE GRANTED A MATCH!

Viktor: WE ARE THE DARK OVERLORDS OF ICE!

Konnor: LET US HEAR YOUR BATTLE CRY! FOR IT SHALL BE YOUR REQUIEM!

Viktor: COME AND PURIFY YOUR SINS!

Konnor: We are evil incarnate! A SHAPELESS INSANITY! WE ARE-

Viktor: We have a match.

Konnor: We do?

Both behemoth's looked over to a posting on a clipboard and scrolled their fingers down until they saw their names.

Viktor: This too must be the will of casualty!

Konnor: A shepherd dressed in his Sunday's finest still reeks of lamb, Barrett and Ryback! Remember this!

Viktor: And your remember your last AND ONLY trip to the wasteland!

The Ascension tore the clipboard from the wall, ripped it in half, and then ate it. Yes, they ate it. But that would not satisfy their hunger. Only the taste of defeated foes would quench this thirst!