Kevin Nash: Well, that was the easy part...
[[Nash begins to scroll through his contact list. Despite being one of the world’s most famous professional wrestlers and enjoying a budding film career, he kept a surprisingly small number of contacts on his personal phone – his wife and son obviously, his agent, and 4 men whom he considered his brothers, even though they hadn’t talked in some time. This was one of those rare occasions which he was actually going to dial one of them - ]]
Kevin Nash: Come on fucker, don’t let me down...
[[Big Kev waits as the phone rings the other end. He’s nervous, actually nervous to be calling. It had not been an easy couple of months lately, between him coming back to his life to reestablish his home, reconciling with the wife, and trying to smooth over a number of legal troubles he’d gotten into during his mental break-down, he had left little time for his friends. Not that he felt he owed them his energy, more that he tried to keep the bonds of friendship going – doubting he would ever again see Michaels or Hunter, his true friend list was becoming increasingly short, but there was one man whom he shared more with than any other, the man on the other side of the line, the man he was nervous calling...suddenly - ]]
Scott Hall: Yo.
Kevin Nash: You mother fucker. How are you man?
Scott Hall: I’m alright, ya’know? Just, well I’m just sitting around doing a whole lot of nothing these days.
Kevin Nash: Whole lot of nothing eh? How about this weekend you and I do something.
Scott Hall: Sure man, I can’t go no where – I’m on a red license or something.
Kevin Nash: No, no man. I’ll bring the party to you. You know how I’m back with EBWF now right?
Scott Hall: No.
Kevin Nash: Oh, well, surprise I guess – I’ve been back for a couple of weeks now.
Scott Hall: What did Hell freeze over, you and Wes –
Kevin Nash: Ah, fuck that – no, no, no. Me and Wes didn’t nothing. I got a deal as a “consultant” to EBWF’s board of directors and then basically had them sign me to an on air deal.
Scott Hall: EBWF board? What the hell man, what happened to Wes?
Kevin Nash: Nothing, he’s still there…
Scott Hall: Than what is this board of directors?
Kevin Nash: It doesn’t matter right now, look, the point is, I’m back in the saddle, and I want you to do a taped show with me.
Scott Hall: I don’t know man, I can’t be traveling, and going back there it’s just –
Kevin Nash: No, no. Don’t worry about that. It’ll be a small crew, hell we’re doing it in Florida – I’m having them fly out with a camera crew on Saturday, the thing airs on Sunday before their pay per view. No travel, no stress, just the two of us goofing off for a half hour.
Scott Hall: Do I gotta sign something, or piss in the cup or something...
[[Those last words froze Nash dead in his tracks. Up to this point he had be casually pacing around his house while talking with his friends, but to hear Hall talk about urine tests – like he might not pass – it sends shivers up and down the spine of the big man.]]
Kevin Nash: No, no test – but even if there was, I mean, you’ve been clean lately right?
Scott Hall: …yeah…more or less, yeah.
Kevin Nash: More or less? What is that, come on man, talk to me, tell me you’ve been clean.
Scott Hall: Yeah, I’ve been sober man. Just, a little weed here or there, but I’ve not drank in a while.
[[Hall’s lack of conviction struck a sensitive nerve with Nash, but he plowed on...]]
Kevin Nash: Alright than. So you’d be fine to do taping with me on Saturday?
Scott Hall: Yeah sure.
Kevin Nash: Alright, awesome dude. I guess I’ll swing by your place in the morning on our way down to Miami.
Scott Hall: Miami?
Kevin Nash: Oh yeah, I didn’t even mention to you yet, I had this whole big surprise thing...
[[Big Sexy continued talking to his friend, and they planned out their mini adventure – this was the beginning of something big, much bigger than just two old rasslers taping a hype show...]]
-It was filmed Saturday June 20, but aired Sunday July 1, directly preceding the event-
[[The song “Welcome Home” by Radical Face plays as we run through a video highlight package showcasing the talent set to appear at EBWF’s King of the Ring. A series of finishing maneuvers as well as clips of the KotR contestants proceeding. We also get small clips of the history between AJ Styles and Ted DiBiase leading up to their World title match. It transitions into the Queen of the Ring tournament highlights, before swirling back to quick images of the final 4 King of the Ring contenders, and ending in a stock image of AJ Styles and Ted DiBiase facing off eye to eye. The image fades to show the EBWF logo before cutting to an image of recently returned Kevin Nash sitting poolside at a beautiful 5 star hotel in Miami Florida.]]
Kevin Nash: Welcome to the uh, I guess we’ll call this the first hype show we’ve ever run. Countdown to the Coronation, cause you know, crowning a new king. Someone give a bonus to the genius who thought up that name for a show. But hey, we’re not here to talk bad about people’s ability to name a show. Actually, we’re here because I was already paid an appearance fee for this weekend – without going into the particulars yet, let’s just say, they didn’t want to send me a check without something for me to do. So, here we are. And I keep saying we, cause, like I tend to do, I roll with some pretty cool guys. So without further ado, let me go ahead and introduce the first of my guests for this half hour of – whatever –
[[The camera pans back to reveal Kevin Nash sitting at a table with an empty chair next to him.]]
Kevin Nash: Da Bad Guy...
[[Scott Hall suddenly pops his head in front of the camera lens. He wiggles his fingers and does his “oooOOOooo” face while heading to his chair.]]
Kevin Nash: My best friend, Scott Hall.
[[Scott sits and does the Kliq-bump with Kevin.]]
Scott Hall: Hey yo.
[[Scott looks at the camera and mugs, knowing he just made a few people mark out that are watching this thing.]]
Kevin Nash: Alright, seeing as how I’m hosting this here show, let me get my Jay Leno going – so Scott, what brings you here today.
Scott Hall: Well, uh, you called me, um, when was that? A day or two ago.
Kevin Nash: Yeah.
Scott Hall: And I guess, you know, someone over in St. Louis thought they should do a show, and you called me up and asked if I uh, you know, wanted to get back in front of the camera. I said no, but you insisted, so hey, free trip from up in Orlando to down here at South Beach, I guess there are worse ways to spend a Saturday.
Kevin Nash: Wow, what a saga!
[[Scott chuckles.]]
Scott Hall: Yeah, I know, right?
Kevin Nash: Oh, and Scott just mentioned Saturday, we’re filming this Saturday, but it’s airing before the pay per view Sunday evening.
Scott Hall: Oh, yeah, see – that’s how in the loop I am.
Kevin Nash: So, why don’t we kick this thing off right – who ya got to be the new King?
Scott Hall: Uh, I don’t know – is Hunter still there?
Kevin Nash: No.
Scott Hall: Oh, um, I don’t know – maybe – are you in it?
Kevin Nash: Not only am I not in it, I got uninvited to the event earlier this week.
Scott Hall: Huh?
Kevin Nash: Doesn’t matter. So let’s see here, I think Dusty’s boy is in it –
Scott Hall: Dust?
Kevin Nash: No, Cody – the kid is coming along nicely.
Scott Hall: Yeah, I always liked Dusty. Good guy, smart too. I felt like he got a lot of bad rap cause of the way he was as a booker – but the guy knew his stuff.
Kevin Nash: Yeah, not everyone can book as well as me.
[[They share a laugh.]]
Scott Hall: Shit, are we suppose to keep kayfabe?
Kevin Nash: Actually, I don’t know – let’s ask – HEY, ARE WE SUPPOSE TO KEEP KAYFABE?
[[The camera swings around to show absolutely no one other than a handful of technicians sitting around watching…]]
Kevin Nash: Oh yeah, that’s right, no one freakin’ told us a damn thing. So hell, do whatever you like I guess.
Scott Hall: Cool, so, anyway, little Cody Rhodes is going for the King huh?
Kevin Nash: Yeah, he’s grown up pretty good. Actually starting to fill out too – remember when he first hit and was like a toothpick?
Scott Hall: Oh god, I thought they were going to break him in half if they actually connected. Alright, well, I like the Rhode family, so I guess he’s my favorite to win this thing.
Kevin Nash: Bold statement, before he even knew everyone involved, making predictions. That’s ballsy!
Scott Hall: Well, uh, when people say Scott Hall they think about Ballsy I guess...
Kevin Nash: Speaking of guys who started out damn small but are making it good, I’m pretty sure Punk is in the tournament too.
Scott Hall: I know he’s uh, straight edge, and whatever – and good for him – but you can’t tell me that dude hasn’t hit the needle once or twice.
Kevin Nash: You think steroids? For him? Really?
Scott Hall: Roids? Nah, nah, I meant heroine. That dude looks like he spent a decade chasing a dragon or something.
[[Kevin Nash bursts into laughter.]]
Kevin Nash: I knew there was a reason I liked that guy. Genuinely though, he’s been putting on good work lately.
Scott Hall: So have you been keeping an eye on EBWF for a while now?
Kevin Nash: When I can. It’s kind of all over the place sometimes.
Scott Hall: It’s always been that was. Remember Russo’s idea of car crash TV?
Kevin Nash: Oh yeah, and people bitch about my booking. Dear god.
Scott Hall: Well Warfare use to be like being in a pile up. Didn’t know who was going or coming.
Kevin Nash: Still like that. I actually just had a phone call earlier this week – so for those of you who don’t know – I was suppose to be facing AJ Styles.
Scott Hall: Ah AJ is in the King tourney too?
Kevin Nash: No, he’s the World Champ.
Scott Hall: Jesus man, I guess it’s been a long minute since I last watched this. Why’d you invite me on this show again?
Kevin Nash: Cause I could. Anyway, so I had myself a pretty special guest lined up to show at the King event – but since I got booted off, for what reason? I don’t know. Maybe AJ pissed his pants, or Wes didn’t want my to headline the event, whatever, it is what it is I guess. Anyway, I thought I’d introduce my special guest to you all now – here on the pre-show, cause he’s a damn cool guy and he wanted to be involved. Do we have him ready?
[[Kevin looks over at the crew...]]
Crew Member: Oh yeah, you want me to get him?
Kevin Nash: Yeah yeah, bring him on out guys.
[[A crew member opens the door from off camera.]]
Scott Hall: HOLY SHIT!
[[Scott jumps to his feet and begins to clap. Kevin rises and starts doing the fake bowing gesture. On to the screen walks newly crowned NBA Finals MVP – LeBron James.]]
LeBron James: How ya all doin?
[[Scott hugs the basketball superstar. Kevin Nash high fives him. He pulls up a chair to the table, while Scott gives him a standing ovation.]]
Kevin Nash: That’s why we’re doing this thing in Miami – ladies and gentlemen out there in TV Land, I give you the one, the only, the best baller in the world today – THE KING LeBron James!
LeBron James: Hey yeah, it’s good to be there man.
Scott Hall: How did – I mean damn – when did this all happen.
LeBron James: Well it was a few days after we won the Championship, I got a call from my man Kevin Nash here – and you know, people always have their agents or managers call my people or whatever, but this dude straight up called me direct, no games, nothing. He congratulated me –
Kevin Nash: Said you had one of the best performances of anyone in NBA Finals history.
LeBron James: Yeah, I mean, it was definitely a team effort. We couldn’t have done it without everyone doing their part. So he asked what I was doing after the parade and celebrations – I said getting ready for the Olympics, he asked if I wanted to do something with EBWF, which I’ve always loved wrestling, and EBWF has such a great product out there.
Kevin Nash: Yeah so I invited him in, I was gonna run with something like he’d be a special ring side enforcer or guest ref, or whatever. Just give him the chance to get in the ring. But then, you know, plans go to shit.
LeBron James: Yeah man, that was kind of disappointing, but hey, you know, I get to be here talking with two of the all time greats of the ring. That’s a trip man.
Scott Hall: No man, it’s crazy, sitting here with you, shit man, I can’t even believe that.
Kevin Nash: So you’re a big EBWF fan right LeBron?
LeBron James: Oh yeah man, for sure.
Kevin Nash: So who’s your pick for the new King?
LeBron James: I gotta go with my man Randy Orton. Dude is a beast. Legit-legit guy. But I’d be hella happy to see Barreta get it. That dude is hilarious, and he reps his geek sheik nerdiness...cause at the end of the day, I’m a big nerd too.
Kevin Nash: Oh you’re a gamer man?
LeBron James: For sure man, for sure. Me and my boys game all the time – are you two gonna be back in EBWF ’13?
Scott Hall: Oh I don’t know man. I won’t be probably.
Kevin Nash: I think I’ll be – you want to be in it Scotty?
Scott Hall: Yeah sure, I guess.
Kevin Nash: I’ll make sure you’re in there bud. And shit, how about we get special commentary from LeBron freakin’ James!
LeBron James: Hey man, I’d be down – but I wanna get in there – ya know. I want go lay the smackdown on some fools!
Kevin Nash: Smackdown the fools? That’s like some scary Rock/Mr. T hybrid action there.
[[They all share a laugh...]]
LeBron James: Ha, ya man, that’s what I’m talking about. So yeah, Trent or Randy, those are my guys.
Kevin Nash: What else caught your eye for the King event?
LeBron James: Well, I think that AJ is cute as a damn button –
Kevin Nash: You’re talking Lee or –
[[LeBron and Kevin laugh. Scott is a little left in the dark, but chuckles along...]]
LeBron James: Yeah man, yeah! No, Styles is the shit bro, but no, yeah, I was talking about AJ Lee. Probably should have cleared that one up.
[[They all continue having a good laugh.]]
LeBron James: But speaking of that man, what’s going on with you and Styles dude? The man is freakin’ awesome, I hear you’re beefin’ with him.
Kevin Nash: Beefing? No. I mean look, I gave him a bit of a hard time for being short, but common, compared to us three, who isn’t right? And I pointed out, it’s been like 10 years since he won his first World Title – shouldn’t he have jumped up a level or something.
LeBron James: Hey, sometimes it takes greatness some time to grow.
Kevin Nash: Look at everyone treating you the last few years. They wanted to see you win a NBA Title. It was Best or Bust.
LeBron James: And I think that helped push me along.
Kevin Nash: Right, and I’m just trying to push him along too. He’s got something, but he’s not getting over to that next level of legend like he should. So I pointed that out, I was told by some people in the company, I was going to be in the World Title match with him tomorrow, or I guess tonight from when this airs. But, I got a phone call, out of no where – that’s been scrapped. No reason why. No nothing. So that’s when I called you, asked if you wanted to do this little show here, since I felt bad for getting you all hyped up.
LeBron James: Well hey man, I’m loving just doing anything I can with you guys.
Scott Hall: And we love having you man. Truly. It’s like an honor just to talk with ya.
Kevin Nash: No doubt about it – me and Scott have partied with a few guys in our day, but this is one of the cooler experiences I’ve ever had.
LeBron James: Well it’s been my pleasure guys.
Kevin Nash: So, I guess real quick, let’s run down the card – can someone hand me a paper with the matches on it, or give me a computer to check the website or something – and we’ll just get you two picking winners.
[[A P.A. hands Nash a paper with all the matches on it...]]
Kevin Nash: Alright, here we go; James Storm/Evan Bourne.
Scott Hall: You go first dude.
LeBron James: I like the Cowboy, but I just love those high flyers – I’ll go Bourne.
Scott Hall: I’ll stick with The King on this on – Bourne.
Kevin Nash: Maria/Layla/Brooke – Sky High Belt.
Scott Hall: Oh shit, Maria?
[[Nash looks at Hall...]]
Kevin Nash: ...yeah...
[[They share a little moment and then move on.]]
LeBron James: Wait, are you going with Maria?
Scott Hall: Me, oh, I mean, sure I guess.
LeBron James: OK, I got Layla.
Kevin Nash: AJ LEE and Beth Phoenix.
LeBron James: Haha, I already said, my girl AJ gonna win this thing.
Scott Hall: You know what, I always liked Beth, she’s an awesome worker. I’ll pick Phoenix.
Kevin Nash: Christy Hemme/Maryse – Queen of the Ring.
Scott Hall: Man is this the new Women’s Wrestling promotion or what?
LeBron James: Beautiful women, kickin’ ass, I love it man.
Scott Hall: Oh man, don’t get me wrong, I love the women we got in this business. I guess I’ll go with Christy Hemme.
LeBron James: I’m picking the FANS are winning with this match.
[[quick laugh]]
Kevin Nash: OK, and then we have the World Title match: Styles and a guy who I think is massively unrated Ted DiBiase.
LeBron James: No doubt, I’m giving it up for my man AJ Styles. He’s the king man, really, the king!
Scott Hall: I’m going DiBiase Jr. I’ve always thought that guy was the total package.
Kevin Nash: DiBiase, it’s your time man. Take the reigns. OK, and then who wins the King of the Ring; Orton, Punk, Barreta or Rhodes?
LeBron James: Damn, I already picked Orton, but that’s some top talent right there.
Scott Hall: I’ll go Orton, cause that dude is the shit man. I mean he gets it.
Kevin Nash: OK, so I’m going to go out there and pick Punk. That guy is just a people magnet or something.
[[Kevin Nash looks around at his buddies and kind of gives a “not bad” look.]]
Kevin Nash: Alright – well, unless someone else has something, I think we’ve got this show talked about. Remember to order King of the Ring, right now, only on Pay Per View. If you stream it online – LeBron here is gonna hunt you down and mow you over.
LeBron James: Oh yeah man.
[[LeBron flexes for the camera.]]
Kevin Nash: Alright, well, get on it, order it up, and hope you enjoyed Countdown to the Coronation.
LeBron James: For real, it’s gonna be off the hook man.
Kevin Nash: Special thanks to EBWF legend Scott Hall, and the best damn baller in the world, The King, LeBron James. I’m Kevin Nash – see ya when we see ya EBWF Universe.
[[The camera cuts, and the order King of the Ring details shows. Video highlights continue to build to the fore coming event.]]
