For a shrink’s office this is sorry. I thought they were the ones who were supposed to help me. Seems like Dr. Doom needs to get away for a little…
Michelle was referring to Dr. Benjamin Gray, her “highly recommended” shrink she was assigned to by Dr. Hope Clemente.
She cut off her own thoughts and shook her head, trying to keep her mind off of that conversation. Being told about how her life was irritated her, even if what Hope had said was true. Certain aspects were falling apart, piece by piece, and sooner or later it would all come crashing down and the world would witness it all. But that was another story. She was here against her own better judgment, only doing it to get Hope off her back.
Ugh, this room needs to catch up. It’s like he’s stuck in the Dark Ages. Maybe the black plague will come back and take what it forgot…
Dr. Gray: Tell me again, Michelle, it’s been a while since we last spoke over the phone-- what exactly is this problem you have with Eva Marie?
The man himself didn’t look horrible. He was decent; Clean shaven, a nice suit, cheap tie, hair combed back with a part on the side. He looked like a typical businessman. But he was dull. What he made up for in looks he lacked in personality. His voice was monotone, his demeanor wasn’t welcoming, and his expression was unreadable. He seemed indifferent. She didn’t know if he was genuinely interested or just struggling through another day on the job.
Michelle: Eva Marie? Why are we talking about her again?
Dr. Gray: She’s your opponent at Warfare. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten… Again.
Michelle: It’s not that I forget. She’s just not important enough for me to worry about or remember.
Dr. Gray: So, let’s return to the question: What is the problem you have with her?
Michelle: I don’t have a problem with her. There are no problems. I haven’t even met her.
Dr. Gray: But what you said on the phone, that doesn’t make much sense with what you’re saying now—
He was cut off.
Michelle: What I said on the phone was “I hate her.” I don’t like her. She’s irrelevant.
Dr. Gray: You’re telling me that she’s irrelevant, meaning you don’t care about her, that she’s not important, yet you hate her. You don’t like her, and you’ve never even met... Would you care to elaborate?
Michelle let out a long winded sigh she’d been holding in for the last half hour she’d been sitting on the sagging, worn leather sofa. The question Dr. Gray asked was a prime opportunity to release it. She stood up, walked over to the Doctor’s desk, and picked up a framed certificate, reading it over silently.
Michelle: What do you think about what I said, Dr. Gray? You are the professional here.
Dr. Gray: I think you’re forcing your anger for something completely different on another issue, the “other issue” being your opponent.
Her gaze narrowed slightly at the certificate when she heard what he had said. He was right. His statement couldn’t have held more truth. There was more to it, though. Complications. Not meant for this visit. She placed the frame gently back on the desk, her gaze lingering on it for a moment as she thought of how to respond. Then she turned to face the therapist, masking her thoughts with a faint smile.
Michelle: You could be right. You could be wrong. That’s the thing, Dr. Gray. You could get away with it and I’d never know. Psychology bears some subjectivity. So does wrestling, obviously. If that wasn’t the case I would not be going against Eva Marie… We’re both professionals in what we do. We have very different careers, but we’re professionals nonetheless…
Then her eyes came across a dagger, one you’d find in the hands of some old time hunter. The hilt was gold and the blade silver, and possessed little detail. She took it off its miniature stand that was at the front of the doctor’s desk and let the cool metal touch her fingertips. She then brought her focus back to the conversation.
Michelle: I hate Eva Marie. It’s the truth. I want to scalp her, rip that raggedy ann red hair right out of her skull by the roots. Then there really will be “red everything.” I have a reason to hate her, too. It’s not like I hate her just because.
He kept a close eye on her, especially since she was now holding a weapon. It wasn’t a real dagger, but it could still harm someone if the wielder really wanted to. She was waving it around carelessly. One slip of her fingers and it would go flying.
Dr. Gray: Why do you hate Eva?
Michelle: Eva Marie is only getting in my way. She’s just another stepping stone on my climb to the top of the mountain. Once I rip her apart and leave her in the dust for the other dogs… I mean divas, to play with, I’ll be that much closer to reaching the summit. MY summit: The EBWF woman’s championship.
You see, Eva Marie will be that little girl that gets left behind, lost in the crowd, while everything else keeps moving on without her, because she’s so small, tiny, easily forgotten, hard to remember, insignificant. Irrelevant.
Her voice hung onto that last word, right down to its last letter, emphasizing her point. She scoffed when she reached the end of her list. To the doctor’s surprise, she had more to say.
Michelle: The difference between Eva Marie and me is clear: she’ll go on and on and on about what she thinks she can do to me, but in the end it won’t matter because I just won’t let it happen. I, on the other hand, CAN do what I want. I’m rich, I’m famous, and I’m in my prime. And what is she? A nobody.
By the time I’ve got what I wanted she and all the other girls in that locker room will not only be begging to be me, they’ll be begging to fight me, get close to me, be in the presence of me and what I’ll have: The gold, the money, the fame, the man I’ll have wrapped around my finger, EVERYTHING!
The blonde headed diva let out another sigh, but this time in content at her own masterpiece she was beginning to paint in her head. She couldn’t help but smirk in spite of herself. Becoming emotional, even in a positive sense, showed she was vulnerable. Any happiness could be easily stripped away, and she knew that, but she couldn’t contain herself.
The doctor had managed to slip the model dagger from her hand as she talked and placed it back on its stand. It appeared he had scribbled a few sentences on his notepad during the course of her dialogue. As quickly as her excitement came, it went away, turning into a harsher mood.
Michelle: Too bad I’ll have to stomp a hole in her to prove a point. I’m gonna knock her pretty little face around so much that even the homeless on Chicago Avenue won’t want to claim her! She’ll be an embarrassment, a mockery, everything she fought NOT to become. I’ll ruin all her hopes and dreams in becoming big in this company… And all she’ll need for that to happen is a Faith Breaker. We’ll see if God can help her later on tonight when she gets in that ring with me.
Dr. Gray’s eyebrows were furrowed as he put a period on his paper to end it all.
Dr. Gray: A rather interesting way of phrasing things. But you do show an excessive amount of hostility….
He paused as he shook his head, rubbing at the back of his skull, reaching into his mind for some sort of answer to give his client. But nothing came together in those few silent seconds.
Dr. Gray: I’m sorry Michelle, but it appears our time is up. We can schedule our next appointment right now, or you can wait and call when you’re ready.
After a rather awkward way to end the session, Michelle stood up, walked by the chair she was first sitting in to pick up her designer purse, and made her way to the door way where she would let herself out.
Michelle: Don’t worry Dr. Gray, I’ll call you. I have a feeling I’ll be back soon.
She said this as she walked down the hallway, each impact of her heels clicking on the wood floor reverberating back into the doctor’s office. He put a thumb and index finger to his chin in thought as he began absorbing the conversation and read over his notes. Michelle McCool was definitely a special case, unlike anything he’d ever seen before.
