Worship Me

[D.J]

The Miz had been on the precipice of getting back to the top over the past several weeks. After finishing as the runner-up in the King of the Ring tournament, he was as focused as he'd ever been at making amends for this soul crushing defeat. After a win over Enzo Amore last week, The Miz found himself ready for another quite literally "golden" opportunity. He would be competing in Kansas City, Missouri in a fatal four way match for a chance at the PTG Championship. This was the route that Miz had taken to win his second EBWF Championship not too long ago, and without question this would be on his brain entering the match at EBWF Sacrifice on Sunday. His opponents were a mixture of new adversaries and familiar foes, as Syxx, Randy Orton, and Cesaro were all standing in the way of Miz and a chance at his 3rd PTG Championship. There was undoubtedly a lot on the mind of the self proclaimed greatest of the great this week, but nothing greater than a desire to regain the PTG Championship, and get his sights set on once again regaining Chris Jericho's EBWF Title.

The scene opened up in a very familiar setting. It was the basement AKA the man cave in the Los Angeles, California home of The Miz. We saw a finished floor, and several couches and chairs to sit on. We also saw several titles in cases and a lot of paraphernalia from The Miz' decorated EBWF career. The Miz was sitting in a plush reclinining chair. He was wearing a white t-shirt that read in black letters. "Your Favorite Wrestler's Favorite Wrestler" he wore black fitted jeans and a pair of white Nike Roshes. He had his elbows on his knees and his hands in fists resting his chin on them. The camera panned around the man cave and picked up Alex Riley who was lying on one of the couches. He was wearing black nike shorts and a red Air Jordan T-Shirt, his shoes were off and he had on black Nike ankle socks. The Miz seemed to be deep in thought, he then broke his trance and popped up as if he was about to say something, but A-Ri, oblivious to Miz, beat him to the punch.

Alex Riley: How awesome is this, Miz? On Sunday you're going to become the #1 contender for the Path to Glory Championship.. which basically means you're going to become the Path To Glory Champion.. because when you're the #1 contender for something- it just basically puts a ticking time bomb on whoever the champion is' reign.

The Miz pondered Alex's statement.

The Miz: Normally I'd be pretty mad at you for waiting an ample enough time to see if I was going to break the silence, but in this case I'd say you couldn't be more right. Last week on Warfare, I beat the hell out of the EBWF Intercontinental Champion, Enzo Amore, and instead of the EBWF saying, hey maybe we should just let Miz face Enzo Amore, beat him into a pool of hair gel in the middle of the ring and take that title. They thought- "no.. Miz is above that title now.. let's put him in the mix to become the PTG Champion- because once he becomes the PTG Champion- he will then become the EBWF Champion.. and you know.. he rules.. so that'll be great when that happens."

Alex Riley: That is probably exactly the thought process that they have.

The Miz smirked.

The Miz: I mean honestly that's a little far fetched- even though that's what they should be thinking, I won't even pretend they have enough sense to think like that. However, without even realizing it, they have basically told everyone that they want me to have another shot at the PTG title- based on the 3 jamoaks I'll be going up against in the match at Sacrifice. Starting from shortest to tallest- the first of these idiots is Syxx- and boy oh boy is idiot the perfect word to describe him. I had heard he might retire, and man I wish he would have. It was JUST starting to smell better in the locker room without him back there. Now he's going to stumble back into the ring reeking of bourbon and being disgustingly overrated, and try to get in my way of becoming PTG Champion. Syxx there's a lot of things you don't seem to realize besides how to spell the number "six." The first of which is the older you get, the more you abuse drugs and alcohol, the more likely it is that you aren't going to be effective in any job.. let alone a job as physically and mentally demanding as being in the EBWF. I mean this isn't a wet t-shirt contest at a Tiki Bar you and all your geezer friends hang out at, this is the mother effin EBWF. This is where you need to be on your A Game, at all times or you not only don't have success, but you get hurt. We've been up and down this road Syxx, and I don't know how many bar tabs you've picked up in your day to keep being afforded these opportunities, because god knows you sure as hell don't deserve them. I'm sick and tired of hearing that I'm going to be in a match against you, each and every time I'm like "really? him.. again? He still works here.. why?" And to be honest- not one person can ever give me an answer that makes sense. Look I'm equal opportunity, I get that when you're here, and you've been here for a long time that means something in of itself, but I guess I'm more lost on WHY he has been allowed to be here this long. There are so many other superstars that I've come across since being here that, sure they paled in comparison to someone like me, but they far exceeded some parasite like Syxx, yet they are here for a fraction of the time. Syxx is like a fart that just lingers in a crowded room for way longer than it should. Every time you think you've gotten rid of him, here he is again either screaming out obscenities at the top of his lungs, acting like a prince or whatever, who knows what he'll do or say now.. I mean honestly Al.. I think this guy has just been dropped on his little greasy head so many times that he doesn't even know who or what he is anymore.. and to be honest neither do I.

Alex laughed.

Alex Riley: I do, he's a loser.

The Miz: Well that is what he is, and that is what he most certainly will be at Sacrifice. Soon he'll be saying "suck it" to more than just the EBWF universe, he'll be putting the word "I'll" before it and "for money" after it, because even though he's been here awhile, he must still need the money.. because why the hell else would this guy continue to come back and put himself through the ridicule, and the physical torture that quite frankly his 5 foot 2 60 year old body just can't withstand anymore. I'm going to abuse him more than he's abused his liver over his professional career. There's not one person who can hang with me in the squared circle Al, that's pretty well documented, I'd say its damn near an iron clad fact.. not even an opinion..but even if people disagree.. they HAVE to at least be smart enough to know that freaking Syxx isn't going to pose any kind of challenge or threat to someone like me. I am at the prime of my career, I am the man around here.. and soon I'll have the gold to back that up. Syxx is on the back nine.. or he would be but he got too drunk and was puking in the woods back on hole 6. To be honest Alex, this guy is so disgusting and vile that they probably wouldn't even let him on the golf course.. and if they did he's not even on the back nine he's passed out in the club house waiting for the groundskeeper to scoop him up and lay him on the ground with the other fertilizer. I'm about as focused as I could be right now Al, I'm locked in, completely dead set on gaining back the PTG Championship and eventually becoming the EBWF Champion again, but it really does test my focus and my patience when I have to go up against a size small bag of bones that should be cleaning my bathroom, not facing me in a match on Pay Per View. Seriously only in America can SYXX be in a sports entertainment company. Only in America can Syxx be looked at as someone their kids view as a role model, or someone to emulate.. and you wonder why other countries hate us. America is a place where you can achieve success and happiness with a strong work ethic and a can do attitude... apparently you can also reach it by injecting every toxin known to man, and being an uneducated, incapable of bathing midget loser who has a constant identity crisis, and you see Syxx that is one of the many many many MANY ways that we differ. While you're trying to figure out if you want to be a degenerate or a polite well spoken diplomat, there's one guy who hasn't changed around here.. and that one guy is me. Every single day of my god damn career I have been the same thing.. I have been the best. I have been must-see, I have been the greatest of the great, the cream of the crop, your favorite wrestler's favorite wrestler. Now I know your dumb Syxx, I know you probably never won a spelling bee, probably can't point out your home state on a map, probably suck at math with the only "Pi" you know being the one you throw in your face when you have the munchies.. but I'm hoping.. I'm praying.. that you're at least smart enough in your "older and wiser" days to know that you should stay the hell away from me. I'm way out of your league now.. I've been way out of your league the second I stepped foot in this business.. and in another "Syxx" decades when I'm damn near 100 or even dead. I'll come visit you in hell.. and guess what little guy? I'll STILL be out of your league. Hash. Tag. Fact.

Alex Riley thought about Miz' last comment.

Alex Riley: Love how you said visit him in hell.. obviously you'll be in heaven.. they'll probably designate a wing for us there.. because we'll be so much better than all the other heaven residents.. dare I say.. the heavidents.

The Miz: Nice...

Alex Riley: Thanks man.. thought it was good too.

The Miz: It was.. especially for you.. if Syxx is the dumbest person in the EBWF you are nipping at his heels.

Alex Riley: It's true.. I'm not book smart.. but I am smart enough to know- A.) Who to hang with and B.) Who is going to win the match at Sacrifice.. and that is.. as you already know.. THEEE MIZ!

The Miz smirked.

The Miz: Well of course it is. I mean who's going to stop me.. the Swiss Superman? Really? The King of Swing? REALLY?! I feel like I'm in the freaking sandlot talking about Babe Ruth with all these dopey nicknames.

Alex Riley: Well I mean you do give yourself a lot of nicknames too, Miz..

The Miz looked cross at Alex.

The Miz: Yeah- but mine are actually true. It's not dopey if it's true. Like the King of Swing, because he twirls you around like a game of human dizzy bat? That is supposed to intimidate me.. I'm unreal at Dizzy Bat- I win every time.. most people get dizzy because their brains aren't at a capacity that they can take the twists and the turns.. my brain is like "pfft. Is this supposed to disorient me.. it must suck to be someone else. That gets effected by this."

Alex Riley: That is true you are strangely good at dizzy bat.. my cousin still talks about how you won his team the Beer Olympics last summer.

The Miz: Of course- I win everything- and this Sunday will be no different whatsoever. Kind of a strange entrant in this match. You got two of the most successful stars in the history of the company in myself and Orton- you got Syxx who has been here forever so he was bound to win a match or a belt somewhere along the way.. and then you got Cesaro.. who just got here recently.. and he's done.. well nothing.

Alex Riley: He eats chocolate.. so I mean.. I guess that's something.

The Miz: Oh right- he does eat chocolate, and he prides himself of being able to get in people's heads. Well I hope that's true Alex.. I hope that Cesaro can go into my head, because when he got there he would see that there isn't one shred of doubt.. one ounce of a belief that he has Switzerland's chance of getting involved in a global conflict of winning this match at Sacrifice. I don't really know what to make of this guy, I mean what is he all about? What does he do? Why is he here? Oh and Syxx.. a global conflict is when countries disagree on policies and sometimes end up going to war over them.

Alex Riley: He does do that punch the air thing- that''s kind of.. well I mean it's kinda lame..

Riley mimicked Cesaro's entrance mannerisms. The Miz smirked at this.

The Miz: Yeah what is that? Doesn't that remind you of when like a little kid is like.. "hey mom watch this."

The Miz did the air punches now.

The Miz: And the mom is like "Oh yeahhhh great hunny." Right before they turn to the other parents and say.. "my kid is such a freaking dweeb.. I blame my husband." As they pour themselves a LARGE glass of wine. Cesaro seems to have a pretty brash and carefree attitude like he thinks he's a force to be reckoned with around here. The one question I have for him.. is why? Do you really think that you're going to accomplish anything here? Do you really think that you'll even be in this company this time next year? Cesaro is definitely one of those guys I was alluding to earlier when I was talking about Syxx. Should be here longer than Syxx? Yes. He at least isn't a slob, rodent like him.. but he won't be.. and the reason is because he's boring and irrelevant. Anytime Cesaro talks people are like "huh.. so that is one of the new guys I'm supposed to believe is gonna stick.... I'm gonna go get a beer instead of listening to the rest of this." Then Cesaro's like... "no wait look.."

The Miz did the air punches once more.

The Miz: "Yep.. definitely beer time." One of the many things that makes me amazing A-Ri is my ability to predict the future. I've already told you that Cesaro isn't winning this match, I've told you that he won't be around this time next year, but I also can tell you that he PROBABLY won't even be around much past this weekend's match. I definitely for see him standing next to Syxx at like a red light somewhere with a sign that says "used to be in the EBWF- now need money to afford chocolate and knock off suits." While Syxx sleeps on a urine soaked cardboard box 3 feet away from him. The one thing I can't see either of these guys doing anytime soon, because quite simply they won't be doing it... is holding the EBWF Path To Glory Championship. The reason for that other than the fact that they are both wastes of perfectly good oxygen.. is that I AM the one who is going to win on Sunday- and I AM the one who is going to then proceed to win the PTG Championship. All these 2 will be able to do then is sit back and watch- and be jealous.. but oh yeah.. they already are. I'm me and they are them.

Alex Riley: True that.

The Miz paused for a second he put the recliner up and really kicked back.

The Miz: I've said it before and I'll say it again Alex. It doesn't suck to be me- it doesn't suck to wake up every day and be The Miz. The fact is there isn't many people on this roster that can claim that they have reached a level of success that even comes close to the one I have over the last 5 years. However, one guy who's resume is pretty impressive is the last many in this fatal four way match.. Randy Orton.

Alex Riley: THE VIPER!!!

The Miz: Randy Orton. He's a name that no matter what he's done or not done.. you hear it.. and you're like "OK now we're talking." Randy Orton is the only person in this match that even makes it relatively intriguing for me. However, Randy before you start getting a little viper in your pants, the reason I'm intrigued isn't because I view you as a worthy adversary. The reason you add excitement and intrigue to this match for me, is NOT because I think you are my equal or that you could keep me from winning. You make this match more interesting for me Orton, because when I win and you don't.. I know people.. because they're idiots.. will be all "OH MY GOD.. Orton lost.. that's so surprising." I live for that look on all their dumb faces when things don't go like they expect them to. People respond to you Randy, they look at you as being Elite.. and not just because you were once an errand bitch boy for a group aptly named.. "Elite." You come off as being someone who can really compete at the highest level around here. Which makes beating your ass all the more fun for me. It's one thing to claim the be the best like I do.. because I am.. and go in and beat some imbecile like Enzo Amore- who even our stupid fans can tell is a complete buffoon. It's another thing entirely to dismantle such a big "STAR" like Randy Orton. Matches against guys like you Randy are the ultimate statement matches for me. What statement you ask? The statement that The Miz is the greatest thing going in this company since sliced bread.. and I'd beat the shit out of sliced bread too.

Alex Riley: So just think Orton.. if he'd crush sliced bread.. just think about what he's going to do to you!

The Miz and Alex both looked goofily into the camera with crazy eyes, before The Miz got serious once more.

The Miz: I'm not trying to downplay you Orton.. I'm just saying you aren't worthy of any of your praise.. your accomplishments mean nothing because you suck.. and that you have no chance to win at Sacrifice.. hmm.. I guess I am downplaying you.

Alex Riley: Dude deserves to be downplayed.

The Miz: Consider yourself downplayed Orton! Because come Sunday you're going to have to consider yourself something else besides a professional wrestler. At least a professional wrestler that has any chance of reaching the heights he miraculously once reached despite having no charisma or talent whatso god damn ever. Now I know, we are going to be in your home state of Missouri, and I know you'll probably have quite the little fan base in attendance.. that's not even remotely lost on me.. in fact it tickles me pink to be honest.. because now I get to embarrass you in front of your own. Now I get to not only see surprised looks of wrestling fan boys who didn't think I could beat you.. but also people who genuinely care about you and your success get to be crushed.. and I get to witness it.. in person! I love Sunday's!

Alex Riley: Sunday fun day!

The Miz: Sunday fun day, INDEED! I'll see all three of you guys at Sacrifice.. you'll recognize me.. I'll be the guy winning.

The Miz winked into the camera and the scene faded to black. The scene reopened in the Sprint Center in Kansas City, Missouri. The site of EBWF Sacrifice. We were at a house show the night before the big event. A match had just concluded when a familiar sound boomed from the PA System. Miz was notorious for weighing in his final thoughts the day before a big match. This night was no different.

AWWWWEEEEEEEESOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEE

Followed by "I Came To Play" by Downstait was heard loudly as the crowd rained down boos on both The Miz and Alex Riley as they emerged through the curtain. They were both dressed in expensive suits and had their hair slicked back with gel. They looked like a million bucks. Both men made their way confidently down the ramp and into the ring. They were granted microphones from the time keeper.

Alex Riley: What's up Kansas City!?

There was a mixed reaction, mostly boos because people hated these two.. especially Riley.. but some cheers because some people are stupid and cheer blindly when their city is mentioned at a wrestling event.

The Miz: Yeah great.. we don't care. I want to talk about something important.. me winning yet another match on a big stage. I'm talking of course about Sacrifice.. which is tomorrow night.. and the EBWF in their infinite wisdom decided to hold that event here.. I can't help that.. so sit down shut up.. and embrace the greatness that is standing before you.

The Miz held his hands out as if to say "worship me." The crowd booed really loudly.. Miz didn't seem to care at all. He raised his hand up.

The Miz: WHEN MY HAND GOES UP- YOUR MOUTHS GO SHUT!

The crowd booed louder.. surprisingly Miz just smirked.

The Miz: Ah what do you expect Al- we aren't exactly in an area of intelligence. This is after all the state that birthed Randy Orton. The fact of the matter is this- this Sunday we have a Fatal Four Way match- the winner will move on to a chance at the Path To Glory Championship. I use the term "chance" loosely- because it's really a certainty that in just 2 matches I am going to be this companies EBWF Path To Glory Champion. Which means you will have to get used to be- VERY SOON- being back exactly where I belong and that is at the top of the EBWF mountain. Standing in my way- and when I say standing in my way.. I mean the 3 guys who will literally "SACRIFICE" themselves in order for that to happen.. you see what I did there?

Alex Riley: I did bro- SACRIFICE- you're a wordsmith.

More boos from the crowd as The Miz waved Riley off sarcastically as if to say "stop it, you're embarassing me."

The Miz: Syxx, Cesaro, and Randy Orton. WHAT A TRIO. What a TEST! What a CHALLENGE.

Feel the sarcasm.

The Miz: WHAT A...

There was a beat.

The Miz: Joke. I mean really- you can say what you want about me.. and you probably will.. and I definitely won't care.. but in my career anytime I have a shred of chance to cash in on opportunities such as these.. I DELIEVER. Like it or not, The Miz is walking out of Sacrifice as the #1 contender for the Path to Glory Championship. A bic'd head quote en quote "strong man." , a grotesque mosquito of a man, nor a tanning bed regular are going to stop me from having my hand raised on Sunday Night. Get a good look at this face- because the next time you see it- it will be attached to the body of a man who is standing above a heap of nobodies flashing a million watt smile.. a smile that will be all too knowing.. and what that smile will know is that in a VERY short period of time.. the beautiful bastard that the smile is on the face of, is a man who will soon reign supreme over the rest.. a man who is elite.. a man who is staggering.. a man who is named.....THEEEEEEEE MIZZZZZZZ... which means he's a man who is....

Awesome.

The Miz flipped the microphone confidently over his shoulder causing a thud as it hit the mat. "I Came To Play" hit the PA once more and boo's filled the Sprint Center. Time would tell if The Miz would be able to hold true to all of his claims and promises. Tune into EBWF Sacrifice to find out!