Talk to the Hand
Posted: Mon Aug 28, 2017 10:59 pm
A black Lincoln Town Care pulled up near a back entrance at the Moda Center in Portland, Oregon. The driver hurried out, and opened the back door. A pair of high heeled boots planted to the pavement, and Trish Stratus appeared, putting on her sunglasses and brushing her thick long locks behind her shoulder.
Trish Stratus: No! You're getting my bags, and you're carrying them all the way inside, because it's your fault that I'm running late! Incompetent little...
Renee Young: Excuse me? Trish?
A camera crew had been lying in wait, filming Trish's arrival and broadcasting it live on EBWF.net. Trish lowered her sunglasses to look at Renee, showing nothing but distain.
Trish Stratus: What do you want? Didn't you hear me? I'm late.
Renee Young: Which is why I was hoping to get a quick word with you about your match tonight with Nikki Cross and Summer Rae for a chance at the EBWF Women's Championship at Destiny.
Trish Stratus: Fine.
Renee Young: If I could just jump right in, Trish... you seem to have a bit of a new attitude tonight...
Trish Stratus: Oh? Do I? Do I have a new attitude? No Renee. This is the same bitchy attitude that I've always had, and tonight, it's out in full force, because I am sick to death of being treated the way that I have been treated by EBWF and the people who run it. The whole damn world knows I was ROBBED of the Queen of the Ring title! The whole world knows Sasha Banks isn't worthy of licking my boots, but for some unknown reason she has a damn title match tonight at the biggest show of the summer and that leaves me relegated to the B TEAM, jerking the curtain for KEVIN OWENS?
She gave a frustrated huff.
Trish Stratus: DO THESE PEOPLE NOT KNOW WHO I AM?
Renee Young: I'm sure you're going to tell us.
Trish Stratus: Listen here, you two bit, nobody... I know that was a crack at my resume, and the way I come in here delivering the receipts week after week, but I don't like your tone.
Renee Young: I'm just saying...
Trish Stratus: I am the runner up in this year's Queen of the Ring tournament. We both know that just means I'm a first place loser. Tonight, I face Nikki Cross and Summer Rae, total HACKS, to become the number one contender for the Women's Championship, and when I do I'm going to have one of my two most hated ladies to face. Either Natalya or Sasha Banks, both of whom are less superior to me.
Renee Young: They've both beaten you a few times at this...
Trish Stratus: Oh, who are you now? Matt Sydal? You can read Wikipedia. Good. Sasha and Natalya are lucky. That's all. Sasha needs to count her lucky stars because this match tonight was stolen from me. The only reason I'm not in the women's championship match tonight is because of ageism and affirmative action.
Renee Young: Trish, are you saying that Sasha only beat you because she's bla....
Trish Stratus: I...
Trish put a hand up in Renee's face.
Trish Stratus: ...might not know what affirmative action is, so if the truck can edit that out...
Renee Young: ...we're live.
Trish Stratus: SEE! Just listening to Summer Rae and Nikki Cross talk NUMBS my BRAIN! I'm got to shut them both up tonight with Chick Kicks to the face, and then I'm moving on to Destiny to fulfill mine!
Renee Young: Trish, assuming Nattie wins tonight, did you realize that if you can't beat Nikki and Summer tonight, that one of them will be the only thing that stands between Natalya and beating your Women's Championship Record?
Trish laughed.
Trish Stratus: What?
Renee Young: Assuming Nattie wins tonight, the only thing standing between your record and Natalya is Nikki Cross or Summer Rae. The day after Destiny is 275 days. Meaning Nattie will become the longest reigning...
Trish put her hand in Renee's face again.
Trish Stratus: You want a fucking Pulitzer Prize in Journalism for being able to use Time-and-date-dot-com? Shut up, Renee. I have a match to win.
She stormed to the door.
Trish Stratus: WHERE ARE MY BAGS?! WHERE IS MY DRESSING ROOM.
The closeup of Renee faded to black, as the blonde interviewer shook her head in disgust at Trish's rude behavior.
Trish Stratus: No! You're getting my bags, and you're carrying them all the way inside, because it's your fault that I'm running late! Incompetent little...
Renee Young: Excuse me? Trish?
A camera crew had been lying in wait, filming Trish's arrival and broadcasting it live on EBWF.net. Trish lowered her sunglasses to look at Renee, showing nothing but distain.
Trish Stratus: What do you want? Didn't you hear me? I'm late.
Renee Young: Which is why I was hoping to get a quick word with you about your match tonight with Nikki Cross and Summer Rae for a chance at the EBWF Women's Championship at Destiny.
Trish Stratus: Fine.
Renee Young: If I could just jump right in, Trish... you seem to have a bit of a new attitude tonight...
Trish Stratus: Oh? Do I? Do I have a new attitude? No Renee. This is the same bitchy attitude that I've always had, and tonight, it's out in full force, because I am sick to death of being treated the way that I have been treated by EBWF and the people who run it. The whole damn world knows I was ROBBED of the Queen of the Ring title! The whole world knows Sasha Banks isn't worthy of licking my boots, but for some unknown reason she has a damn title match tonight at the biggest show of the summer and that leaves me relegated to the B TEAM, jerking the curtain for KEVIN OWENS?
She gave a frustrated huff.
Trish Stratus: DO THESE PEOPLE NOT KNOW WHO I AM?
Renee Young: I'm sure you're going to tell us.
Trish Stratus: Listen here, you two bit, nobody... I know that was a crack at my resume, and the way I come in here delivering the receipts week after week, but I don't like your tone.
Renee Young: I'm just saying...
Trish Stratus: I am the runner up in this year's Queen of the Ring tournament. We both know that just means I'm a first place loser. Tonight, I face Nikki Cross and Summer Rae, total HACKS, to become the number one contender for the Women's Championship, and when I do I'm going to have one of my two most hated ladies to face. Either Natalya or Sasha Banks, both of whom are less superior to me.
Renee Young: They've both beaten you a few times at this...
Trish Stratus: Oh, who are you now? Matt Sydal? You can read Wikipedia. Good. Sasha and Natalya are lucky. That's all. Sasha needs to count her lucky stars because this match tonight was stolen from me. The only reason I'm not in the women's championship match tonight is because of ageism and affirmative action.
Renee Young: Trish, are you saying that Sasha only beat you because she's bla....
Trish Stratus: I...
Trish put a hand up in Renee's face.
Trish Stratus: ...might not know what affirmative action is, so if the truck can edit that out...
Renee Young: ...we're live.
Trish Stratus: SEE! Just listening to Summer Rae and Nikki Cross talk NUMBS my BRAIN! I'm got to shut them both up tonight with Chick Kicks to the face, and then I'm moving on to Destiny to fulfill mine!
Renee Young: Trish, assuming Nattie wins tonight, did you realize that if you can't beat Nikki and Summer tonight, that one of them will be the only thing that stands between Natalya and beating your Women's Championship Record?
Trish laughed.
Trish Stratus: What?
Renee Young: Assuming Nattie wins tonight, the only thing standing between your record and Natalya is Nikki Cross or Summer Rae. The day after Destiny is 275 days. Meaning Nattie will become the longest reigning...
Trish put her hand in Renee's face again.
Trish Stratus: You want a fucking Pulitzer Prize in Journalism for being able to use Time-and-date-dot-com? Shut up, Renee. I have a match to win.
She stormed to the door.
Trish Stratus: WHERE ARE MY BAGS?! WHERE IS MY DRESSING ROOM.
The closeup of Renee faded to black, as the blonde interviewer shook her head in disgust at Trish's rude behavior.