Fashion Police
Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2018 4:46 pm
Backstage at the Moda Center, Tyler Breeze and Noam Dar were in Jimmy Havoc’s office. Jimmy Havoc wasn’t there - he was in the ring with Chris Jericho, making the announcement that the 2018 men’s Royal Rumble match would be the the vacant EBWF World Title. Dar and Breeze were watching the announcement on the TV in the office. It wasn’t clear whether or not they had been told they could wait in Havoc’s office, but they were certainly making themselves at home. Breeze was sprawled across Havoc’s couch with his feet up, while Dar was sitting in Havoc’s chair, feet on the table whilst rummaging through the drawers.
Noam Dar: Kinda cool the Title is up for grabs in the rumble aye? Imagine Gorgeous Guys EBWF World Champions!
Dar waited for Breeze to answer, but Breeze didn’t seem to register that Dar had spoken. He was staring at the TV intently. Dar nudged him, and this brought Breeze out of his trance.
Tyler Breeze: Sorry, did you say something? I wasn’t listening. I was distracted by how ugly Jimmy Havoc is. Look at those jeans, man. Ripped jeans are so 2017. And I’m pretty sure that t-shirt hasn’t been ironed. He’s the GM, Noam! He should dress better. I ought to write him a ticket from the Fashion Police…
Noam Dar: Fashion Police? What’s that?
Tyler Breeze: It’s my side job, Noam. I work undercover, keeping the world fashionable. Why do you think I approached you in the first place?
Noam gave Tyler a sideways look.
Noam Dar: Anyway, how can he be a GM and NOT be in a lovely suit? He’s disgusting!
Jimmy Havoc walked into the room, right on cue to see Tyler and Noam in his office. They quickly stood up and looked nervous.
Jimmy Havoc: Two things. What the fuck are you doing in my office? And who’s disgusting?
Dar and Breeze looked panicked. Breeze was first to react.
Tyler Breeze: We wanted to talk to you… it’s urgent. And we were just saying how disgusting Jericho’s tattoos are.
Jimmy Havoc: Okay… you would be right too. Dude’s like 50 or something.
Havoc pushed past Noam and sat down behind his desk.
Jimmy Havoc: What can I do for you?
Tyler Breeze: Well Jimmy… Mr Havoc… we won the Tag Titles over a month ago, and we haven’t had a match as a tag team since!
Jimmy Havoc: Well, we’ve been busy with the Rumble stuff and Punk returning. Honestly, there’s not many other Tag teams for you guys to face.
Noam Dar: Aye but what good is a title when you can’t be on TV showing it off man?!
Jimmy Havoc: Fair point, okay I’ll give you a match next week! How does that sound?
Noam Dar: That’s more like it! Best decision you’ve made all week,a lot better than the decision you made when you got dressed this morning!
Jimmy Havoc: What?
Noam Dar: Nothing.
Tyler gave Noam a glare.
Tyler Breeze: and who would be our opponents Mr. Havoc?
Jimmy Havoc: Well, how about this, you will face off against the guy Noam lost his Breakout title to. Chris Hero! His partner will be Tomasso Ciampa!
Noam looked thrilled. Tyler sighed.
Tyler Breeze: A guy so fat he struggles to find a t-shirt that covers his gut, and a bald guy that’s probably never used a toothbrush. Did you deliberately pick the two ugliest guys on the roster, Jimmy?
Jimmy Havoc: Not intentionally, but that is what’s happened! No they were also the only 2 available so. Be happy with what you have.
Breeze forced a smile.
Tyler Breeze: We’re happy. Thanks Jim! We’re also happy because we got to see that wonderful shirt you’re wearing.
Noam Dar: But its aw-
Tyler Breeze: Awesome Yes! Good observation Noam!
As they left the room Havoc could still hear them chattering.
Noam Dar: You didn’t actually like that shirt did you?!
Tyler shook his head.
Tyler Breeze: No. I was just scared if I dissed his shirt, he’d put us against Braun Strowman or something. We can handle Hero and Ciampa. You’ve already beaten Ciampa, I’ll just distract Hero with pizza or something.
Noam Dar: Pizza is a good idea, I don’t think I could get Hero’s tree trunks in the kneebar and you saw the PPV I could not lift that boy up no chance!
Tyler Breeze: Okay. You take care of Ciampa, I’ll take care of Hero, and maybe afterwards we can buy Havoc a new shirt.
Tyler and Noam laughed, then walked down the hallway.
Noam Dar: Kinda cool the Title is up for grabs in the rumble aye? Imagine Gorgeous Guys EBWF World Champions!
Dar waited for Breeze to answer, but Breeze didn’t seem to register that Dar had spoken. He was staring at the TV intently. Dar nudged him, and this brought Breeze out of his trance.
Tyler Breeze: Sorry, did you say something? I wasn’t listening. I was distracted by how ugly Jimmy Havoc is. Look at those jeans, man. Ripped jeans are so 2017. And I’m pretty sure that t-shirt hasn’t been ironed. He’s the GM, Noam! He should dress better. I ought to write him a ticket from the Fashion Police…
Noam Dar: Fashion Police? What’s that?
Tyler Breeze: It’s my side job, Noam. I work undercover, keeping the world fashionable. Why do you think I approached you in the first place?
Noam gave Tyler a sideways look.
Noam Dar: Anyway, how can he be a GM and NOT be in a lovely suit? He’s disgusting!
Jimmy Havoc walked into the room, right on cue to see Tyler and Noam in his office. They quickly stood up and looked nervous.
Jimmy Havoc: Two things. What the fuck are you doing in my office? And who’s disgusting?
Dar and Breeze looked panicked. Breeze was first to react.
Tyler Breeze: We wanted to talk to you… it’s urgent. And we were just saying how disgusting Jericho’s tattoos are.
Jimmy Havoc: Okay… you would be right too. Dude’s like 50 or something.
Havoc pushed past Noam and sat down behind his desk.
Jimmy Havoc: What can I do for you?
Tyler Breeze: Well Jimmy… Mr Havoc… we won the Tag Titles over a month ago, and we haven’t had a match as a tag team since!
Jimmy Havoc: Well, we’ve been busy with the Rumble stuff and Punk returning. Honestly, there’s not many other Tag teams for you guys to face.
Noam Dar: Aye but what good is a title when you can’t be on TV showing it off man?!
Jimmy Havoc: Fair point, okay I’ll give you a match next week! How does that sound?
Noam Dar: That’s more like it! Best decision you’ve made all week,a lot better than the decision you made when you got dressed this morning!
Jimmy Havoc: What?
Noam Dar: Nothing.
Tyler gave Noam a glare.
Tyler Breeze: and who would be our opponents Mr. Havoc?
Jimmy Havoc: Well, how about this, you will face off against the guy Noam lost his Breakout title to. Chris Hero! His partner will be Tomasso Ciampa!
Noam looked thrilled. Tyler sighed.
Tyler Breeze: A guy so fat he struggles to find a t-shirt that covers his gut, and a bald guy that’s probably never used a toothbrush. Did you deliberately pick the two ugliest guys on the roster, Jimmy?
Jimmy Havoc: Not intentionally, but that is what’s happened! No they were also the only 2 available so. Be happy with what you have.
Breeze forced a smile.
Tyler Breeze: We’re happy. Thanks Jim! We’re also happy because we got to see that wonderful shirt you’re wearing.
Noam Dar: But its aw-
Tyler Breeze: Awesome Yes! Good observation Noam!
As they left the room Havoc could still hear them chattering.
Noam Dar: You didn’t actually like that shirt did you?!
Tyler shook his head.
Tyler Breeze: No. I was just scared if I dissed his shirt, he’d put us against Braun Strowman or something. We can handle Hero and Ciampa. You’ve already beaten Ciampa, I’ll just distract Hero with pizza or something.
Noam Dar: Pizza is a good idea, I don’t think I could get Hero’s tree trunks in the kneebar and you saw the PPV I could not lift that boy up no chance!
Tyler Breeze: Okay. You take care of Ciampa, I’ll take care of Hero, and maybe afterwards we can buy Havoc a new shirt.
Tyler and Noam laughed, then walked down the hallway.