Oh, I just can't wait to be king... AGAIN!
Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 8:33 pm
7:33 PM
The Hardy Compound
- The scene opened up and we see Matt Hardy standing somewhere on The Hardy Compound outside of a square fence. Hardy is looking in to the fence at something with a angry look on his face. In his right hand, he held a key –
Matt Hardy: Did you see that?! Did you witness what I accompleeshed this past week? I defeated Bobby Roode, without an ounce of love in my body! Something YOU said couldn’t be done! You see, Gandhi, I gathered all of you on this land with me so we could share ideas. Common ideas, that would help me succeed in my expeeeedition to become the greatest ever on this planet. Everyone here that surrounds me, except you, seems to be on the same page. Genghis teaches me how to destroy my prey! Achilles teaches me how to improve my weaknesses. The list goes on and on. But you?! THAT is a totally deeeeferent story. All you ever talk about is love and defeating my opponents with love. You are, essentially, a glorified Teletubby, which isn’t a terrible thing. King Maxel very much enjoys the Teletubbies. You views on life, this day in age, are OBSOLETE! For that reason, I have come to the difficult conclusion to set you free. Your insights will do NOTHING to help me here. You need to go find someone whose life will be fulfilled with love. Your time on The Hardy Compound has come to an end Gandhi.
- Hardy lifted the key and unlocked the gate that was keeping the fence closed. Gandhi slowly approached the open gate and exited the fence containment. He and Hardy made one last eye contact before he turned around and stared to walk off –
Matt Hardy: Wait! I could never allow you to start your great journey without a gift that will help you. Come hither to receive your bountiful gift, my friend!!
- Gandhi, the elephant, turned around and approached Hardy. Hardy scampered off for a second and returned with a sleeping bag to the end of a stick –
Matt Hardy: Look! It’s like one of those bags that people carry when they go hitchhiking! A sack, filled with goodies, and it’s even tied to a stick!
- Hardy paused as if he were listening to Gandhi –
Matt Hardy: What’s in the sack? Well, carrots, OF COURSE! And I realize now that you won’t be able to carry this gift, since elephants were created sans hands! Here, I will tie it to your trunk!!
- The elephant put his trunk down and Hardy tied his gift to it. The camera made a couple of intense cutscenes and showed Hardy and Gandhi exchange some looks at each other –
Matt Hardy: Go Gandhi! Your time on the compound has run out!
- Gandhi turned and walked away from Hardy and in to the woods that surround the compound. Hardy turned away from where the elephant had walked in to the woods and put his hands in the air –
Matt Hardy: YEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS! The deed is done! Now, I have room for the one who really deserves to be in this cage! WONDERFUL!!!
- As Hardy yelled wonderful, a clap of thunder was heard from above the compound. Hardy lowered his arms and stared off, breathing heavily, as the camera zoomed in on his face and faded to black -
3:00 PM
The Hardy Compound
- The aerial camera showed Matt Hardy standing in front of his home on The Hardy Compound. Hardy, dressed in his normal red and black attire, stared at the camera and gestured it in closer to his face –
Matt Hardy: Hello there, and welcome to The Hardy Compound! The only place on Earth that is truly magical. Don’t believe what Disney tells you. Disney isn’t magical, Disney is corrupt! Disney is full of LIARS!
- Hardy paused and recomposed himself –
Matt Hardy: Earlier today, the talented and beautiful Renee Young entered my abode and sat down with me, holding what some could call an interview of sorts. Having Renee in my house was splendid! I hope you enjoy it as much as I did… YESSSSSSSSSSSSS.
- The camera faded to black and then faded back in to a shot that saw Matt Hardy sitting in a lavish library within his house. Suddenly there was a knock on the door. The door opened and a man poked his head around the door opening –
?????: Mr. Hardy, Mrs. Young is here, Sir.
Matt Hardy: Senior Benjamin, that is wonderful! Send her in!
- The door opened wide open and what is clearly Matt Hardy in a blonde wig walked in to the room. The camera cut back to Hardy and showed his surprised and pleased face. The camera then cut back to Hardy dressed up like Renee Young, wearing a red shirt and red pants. He sat down across from Hardy and smiled at Hardy. The camera cut back and forth the whole interview to show only one person in the room at a time –
Matt Hardy: Renee, welcome to The Hardy Compound! I’m very ecstatic that you accepted my invitation and agreed to sit down with me once moorrrrrrrre!
Renee Hardy: Of course, Matt. I appreciate you reaching out to me. Hopefully what happened last time won’t happen again.
Matt Hardy: Never, Renee! What happened last time was a complete accccccident. I assure you, and assure you once more, that will not happen.
Renee Hardy: Last night, we witnessed a bizarre site when you banished an elephant from your grounds. Can you explain that?
Matt Hardy: What an exquisite question, Renee! Last night, I cut ties with someone who was holding me down. While I initially enjoyed Gandhi being on my compound. But after time, like it always does, his time came to an end here. Much like Chris Jericho’s time will come to an end in this tournament. Imagine it, if you will, what I can get done now that I have someone like Gandhi out of my life. Gandhi, the fool who was always trying to preach love. Always trying to convince me that hugging it out was the right way to go. No, Gandhi, hugging doesn’t work for anyone, except Barney! I had to DELETE him from this compound. DELETE his existence in this world forevermore!
Renee Hardy: What do you have to say to Jericho about your match Monday night?
Matt Hardy: Kicking him off of the compound opened up a spot for another great mind. A mind that I can learn from on a daily basis. Monday night, Jericho will be escorted here, where he will become the newest member of The Hardy Compound! Yes, with his expertise and experience, I will be UNSTOPPPPPABLE!
Renee Hardy: You just said Jericho could help you become a better fighter. How, then, do you plan on beating him Monday night?
Matt Hardy: Chris Jericho, while a brilliant mind, is not in his prime. He used to be one of the best in this company. He used to go out and put on brilliant matches, beating some of the best this business had to offer. You notice, if you will, that the past description of Jericho was all past tense. Much like every individual and animal on this compound I have gathered. Some of the greatest fighting minds and kings to ever walk this earth. Jericho checks off both of those boxes. He has a great fighting mind and was once a king of this business. That, Renee, is something him and I will have in common very soon. In a couple of weeks as a matter of fact, when I am victorrrrrrious and win the King of the Ring tournament, once again holding a throne. Renee, King Maxel has a favorite movie right now. That movie is Lion King. And much like that little guy in that movie, I can’t wait to be king!
- Hardy cleared his throat and began to sing –
Matt Hardy:
Like no king was before
I'm brushing up on looking down
I'm working on my roar
Jericho, here, on The Hardy Compound, you will see many magical things. But you can rest asssssured that some of the magic this place holds will travel with me. For that reason, I hope you dig deep, and can find your magic that has kept you going for the past two decades in this business. Alas, if you can’t find that magic, that you so desperately need to defeat me… your run at the throne… MY throne… will be cut short, and your dreams of regaining the crowd in EBWF will be… DELLLLLLLLLLLLLETED!
- Hardy stood up and looked at the camera and began to yell ‘DELETE’ over and over again until the camera faded to darkness –