Shock Therapy
Posted: Sun Sep 16, 2012 5:28 pm
Today's promo..!!
SHOCK THERAPY
- Do you know what would be really shocking?
- If Maria ever had a good match! Doh ho ho ho!
*Montreal, Quebec, Canada was the home of EBWF's very crass Women's Champion. Ever since arriving she had been treated like royalty which was obviously something she had grown accustomed to. It had even been declared "Maryse Ouellet Appreciation Day". All of these things were doing very little to deflate her already colossal sized ego. So there she sat on the hood of an enormous pink jeep in front of the Centre Bell arena. She was wearing a sparkling, ridiculously tight white dress with dark sunglasses and her platinum hair looked extraordinary. Her title was resting over one of her shoulders. A huge crowd was gathered around her vehicle as she signed autographs effortlessly. She simply signed and tossed the object back to the fan with ease. In America she was booed. But in Canada she was a hero. Todd Grisham stood by looking up at the champ as she flicked her glorious head of hair backwards.*
Todd Grisham: I am here with Women's Champion Maryse and we have quite a scene here. Dozens of fans are lined up to catch a glimpse of the hometown girl who goes one on one with Maria in a champion vs champion match. Let me try and get a bit closer..
*The announcer had to squirm his way through the large crowd in order to hold his microphone up in Maryse's direction.*
Todd Grisham: Maryse! Maryse! Todd Grisham here! I wanted to get a few words with you.
*Maryse continued to scribble down her signature without giving Todd a glance.*
Maryse: I know who you are, virgin-geek-boy.
Todd Grisham: In your hometown you're are going to be facing Sky High Champion Maria in a match where you are obviously going to have the home field advantage.
*Maryse lowered her sunglasses and looked down at Grisham upon hearing the name "Maria"*
Maryse: Why is it that every time I glance at a monitor that bitch is out in the ring saying my name?
Todd Grisham: Well, you and Paige did attack her and most of the Diva's Division a month or so ago.
*The French Canadian threw her hands up in disgust*
Maryse: We attacked like..fifteen people that night! Don't hear them whining about it every week. Ugh. What an attention whore. Why exactly is she getting a match against The Queen? Didn't she lose to god damn Kelly Kelly right after she won her title? I'm sorry if I'm not taking her entirely serious as a threat. Not to mention the fact that the woman is as about as smart as a bag of rocks with about as much personality.
*Maryse made a pouty expression and delicately tapped a finger at her lips.*
Maryse: Awwwh. I guess I should be careful. Poor little sensitive Maria didn't like it when Paige called her brain dead. Even though it's all completely and utterly true! Yes it is! Oh, yes it is! Who's a perfect little dumb ass? Maria is! Maria is!
*Ms. Ouellet spoke as if she was talking to a simple, house hold pet before scoffing and returning to her usual speaking voice.*
Maryse: Clearly, she is nowhere in my league. Plus the last time we had a match? I whipped her fire crotch ass without breaking a sweat. And now that I am here in lovely Quebec..
*She stretched her arms out as the group that was gathered cheered very loudly.*
Maryse: ..I'm going to have every last person in that arena cheering me on. Do you know what a pop sounds like? I'm going to blow the roof off of that place when I step through that curtain. Look at me. I am a god damn conquering hero. I'm sitting on a big pink jeep like a rock star. Everyone here loves me. I'm GORGEOUS. My accent is amazing. ..And then we have Maria. She has no ambition and she dresses like a dickhead. Seriously. She looks like she shop lifts at Fashion Bug. And Monday night I'm going to smack my name right out of here mouth and teach her not to speak of royalty unless she has MY permission. I'm not viewing this as Champion vs Champion. I'm viewing this as a woman vs a little girl.
*Maryse smirked with all of the confidence in the world.*
Maryse: Maria a l'air d'un chien stupide.
*The crowd cheered their heads off again upon hearing the native language.*
Maryse: Oh, it doesn't matter what I say, does it? It all sounds so..sexy in French. And that is exactly what I am. And Maria is..just..not. She doesn't compare to me. In any regard. I know she's so insanely jealous that she really thinks that she wants match but trust me when I assure that she does not. The reaction I'm going to get..is going to the kind that Hulk Hogan got in the late eighties when he came out to wrestle some ethnic stereotype. In retrospect, Maria is going to get a reaction..hm..that's somewhere between Camacho..and the Brooklyn Brawler. Oh, it's going to just hurt that poor idiot's pride. Right before I hurt everything else.
*Maryse laughed along with the crowd's admiration.*
Maryse: I've got a question. What's the difference between a bowling ball and Maria's p--
*Before Maryse could complete her undoubtedly rude question, one scruffy bearded guy in a ROH t-shirt rose his voice to be heard. He pointed up at Maryse in anger.*
Fan: You are a whore, Maryse! You flaunt your body and sexuality! You're not a true wrestler! I hope Maria takes you out!
*There were loud boo's from the other fan's and Maryse glared down at the open-spoken man. After a moment she began to grin.*
Maryse: Flattery will get you nowhere.
*She snapped her fingers with a sneer.*
Maryse: First person to bring me one of his teeth gets to rub my feet.
*The overly enthusiastic crowd began to chase the man all the while French obscenities were heard and shouted from every direction. Grisham was thanking Maryse for her time but she didn't respond. She just stared off into space with some heavy thoughts on her mind. Maryse was never at a loss for words but this was a rare occasion.*
- What's the difference between Maria and a brick?
- At least a brick get's laid. Doh ho ho ho!
*A small office in the Centre Bell is where EBWF's Director of Medical Staff had set up shop. Dr. Hope Clemente was meeting with Maryse for a simple routine discussion. Maryse was a champion now and getting a bigger position in the public eye and the meeting was just to see how she was handling things. And since Maryse usually cussed up a storm and behaved in a lewd manner whenever a camera was on her, EBWF of otherwise, there was some alarm. The Doctor sat back in a chair beside the leather couch Maryse had made herself comfy on. The blond was dressed very..normal for her. Nothing overly sexy or eye catching.*
Dr. Hope: So you say you don't feel any added pressure, right?
Maryse: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dr. Hope: Nothing on your mind.
Maryse: No.
Dr. Hope: And your..sex life. Seems a bit..open.
*She picked her words carefully. Maryse allowed a hand to rest on her cheek and grinned just slightly.*
Maryse: If you had a sex life, would you even worry about mine?
Dr. Hope: Well, my husband and I are just fine. I assure you. But we're here to talk about you. I understand you had an incident with a fan earlier today?
*Maryse rolled her eyes and used one of her hands in a "talking" motion.*
Maryse: That was an incident? I get called a whore all the time. It doesn't bother me. Except..
*She seemed to drop her attitude and her guard.*
Dr. Hope: Yes?
Maryse: ..maybe I'm just trying to be a powerful woman. Maybe I just have all this sex because it makes me feel powerful. Like I have some kind of control over men. I've been trying so, so hard to get noticed since I came here. To be mentioned alongside the men. To not be lumped in with these boring ass cookie cutters like Maria or Alicia Fox. Do you know how much I DON'T want to be mentioned in the same breath as people like them? If people see them and think I'm ANYTHING like that it just makes me want to vomit. They have their little spots but they never do anything memorable and they get content with mediocrity. It gets exhausting.
*Her posture slumped while she began to rub at the corners of her eyes*
Dr. Hope: What you want to do is admirable. But maybe you aren't going about it the best way. And Paul Heyman might not be the best influence. I've never really talked to you very much about your past. Are there any relationships that may have given you this mind set?
*She sighed heavily.*
Maryse: I've never been one to beg. But there was one guy. And I thought if I told him I loved him that would be enough. I mean, look at me. I'm beautiful. I should be able to get any guy on the planet. But not him. I wasn't enough. Maybe that's why I'm so dead set on being right up there with the men. So he can see how strong I am. And if people think I'm like Maria or whoever else..just some dingy, dull, broad..it..it..
*Her voice choked and she placed her hands over her face. Silence for a few moments before she dropped her hands and smirked.*
Maryse: ..was all bullshit. Everything I just said. None of that was true. I like having lots of sex because it's FUN! I like making lots of money so I can flaunt it! I don't care about women empowerment garbage. I just hate bitches like Maria and smacking them around passes time. I'm here to get rich and famous and I know just how to do it, Doc. And curtain jerking Diva's don't get filthy stinking rich! But Diva's who do shocking things and win titles and look soooo damn hot? They can get the world. And they can make it look easy.
*After laughing to herself Maryse stood, dusted her hands off and flicked her hair back.*
Maryse: Did we almost have a break through? HAH.
*Maryse left the office and headed off into the hallway while screaming something about how bad the catering was, her voice slipping between English and French.*
SHOCK THERAPY
- Do you know what would be really shocking? - If Maria ever had a good match! Doh ho ho ho!*Montreal, Quebec, Canada was the home of EBWF's very crass Women's Champion. Ever since arriving she had been treated like royalty which was obviously something she had grown accustomed to. It had even been declared "Maryse Ouellet Appreciation Day". All of these things were doing very little to deflate her already colossal sized ego. So there she sat on the hood of an enormous pink jeep in front of the Centre Bell arena. She was wearing a sparkling, ridiculously tight white dress with dark sunglasses and her platinum hair looked extraordinary. Her title was resting over one of her shoulders. A huge crowd was gathered around her vehicle as she signed autographs effortlessly. She simply signed and tossed the object back to the fan with ease. In America she was booed. But in Canada she was a hero. Todd Grisham stood by looking up at the champ as she flicked her glorious head of hair backwards.*
Todd Grisham: I am here with Women's Champion Maryse and we have quite a scene here. Dozens of fans are lined up to catch a glimpse of the hometown girl who goes one on one with Maria in a champion vs champion match. Let me try and get a bit closer..
*The announcer had to squirm his way through the large crowd in order to hold his microphone up in Maryse's direction.*
Todd Grisham: Maryse! Maryse! Todd Grisham here! I wanted to get a few words with you.
*Maryse continued to scribble down her signature without giving Todd a glance.*
Maryse: I know who you are, virgin-geek-boy.
Todd Grisham: In your hometown you're are going to be facing Sky High Champion Maria in a match where you are obviously going to have the home field advantage.
*Maryse lowered her sunglasses and looked down at Grisham upon hearing the name "Maria"*
Maryse: Why is it that every time I glance at a monitor that bitch is out in the ring saying my name?
Todd Grisham: Well, you and Paige did attack her and most of the Diva's Division a month or so ago.
*The French Canadian threw her hands up in disgust*
Maryse: We attacked like..fifteen people that night! Don't hear them whining about it every week. Ugh. What an attention whore. Why exactly is she getting a match against The Queen? Didn't she lose to god damn Kelly Kelly right after she won her title? I'm sorry if I'm not taking her entirely serious as a threat. Not to mention the fact that the woman is as about as smart as a bag of rocks with about as much personality.
*Maryse made a pouty expression and delicately tapped a finger at her lips.*
Maryse: Awwwh. I guess I should be careful. Poor little sensitive Maria didn't like it when Paige called her brain dead. Even though it's all completely and utterly true! Yes it is! Oh, yes it is! Who's a perfect little dumb ass? Maria is! Maria is!
*Ms. Ouellet spoke as if she was talking to a simple, house hold pet before scoffing and returning to her usual speaking voice.*
Maryse: Clearly, she is nowhere in my league. Plus the last time we had a match? I whipped her fire crotch ass without breaking a sweat. And now that I am here in lovely Quebec..
*She stretched her arms out as the group that was gathered cheered very loudly.*
Maryse: ..I'm going to have every last person in that arena cheering me on. Do you know what a pop sounds like? I'm going to blow the roof off of that place when I step through that curtain. Look at me. I am a god damn conquering hero. I'm sitting on a big pink jeep like a rock star. Everyone here loves me. I'm GORGEOUS. My accent is amazing. ..And then we have Maria. She has no ambition and she dresses like a dickhead. Seriously. She looks like she shop lifts at Fashion Bug. And Monday night I'm going to smack my name right out of here mouth and teach her not to speak of royalty unless she has MY permission. I'm not viewing this as Champion vs Champion. I'm viewing this as a woman vs a little girl.
*Maryse smirked with all of the confidence in the world.*
Maryse: Maria a l'air d'un chien stupide.
*The crowd cheered their heads off again upon hearing the native language.*
Maryse: Oh, it doesn't matter what I say, does it? It all sounds so..sexy in French. And that is exactly what I am. And Maria is..just..not. She doesn't compare to me. In any regard. I know she's so insanely jealous that she really thinks that she wants match but trust me when I assure that she does not. The reaction I'm going to get..is going to the kind that Hulk Hogan got in the late eighties when he came out to wrestle some ethnic stereotype. In retrospect, Maria is going to get a reaction..hm..that's somewhere between Camacho..and the Brooklyn Brawler. Oh, it's going to just hurt that poor idiot's pride. Right before I hurt everything else.
*Maryse laughed along with the crowd's admiration.*
Maryse: I've got a question. What's the difference between a bowling ball and Maria's p--
*Before Maryse could complete her undoubtedly rude question, one scruffy bearded guy in a ROH t-shirt rose his voice to be heard. He pointed up at Maryse in anger.*
Fan: You are a whore, Maryse! You flaunt your body and sexuality! You're not a true wrestler! I hope Maria takes you out!
*There were loud boo's from the other fan's and Maryse glared down at the open-spoken man. After a moment she began to grin.*
Maryse: Flattery will get you nowhere.
*She snapped her fingers with a sneer.*
Maryse: First person to bring me one of his teeth gets to rub my feet.
*The overly enthusiastic crowd began to chase the man all the while French obscenities were heard and shouted from every direction. Grisham was thanking Maryse for her time but she didn't respond. She just stared off into space with some heavy thoughts on her mind. Maryse was never at a loss for words but this was a rare occasion.*
- What's the difference between Maria and a brick? - At least a brick get's laid. Doh ho ho ho!*A small office in the Centre Bell is where EBWF's Director of Medical Staff had set up shop. Dr. Hope Clemente was meeting with Maryse for a simple routine discussion. Maryse was a champion now and getting a bigger position in the public eye and the meeting was just to see how she was handling things. And since Maryse usually cussed up a storm and behaved in a lewd manner whenever a camera was on her, EBWF of otherwise, there was some alarm. The Doctor sat back in a chair beside the leather couch Maryse had made herself comfy on. The blond was dressed very..normal for her. Nothing overly sexy or eye catching.*
Dr. Hope: So you say you don't feel any added pressure, right?
Maryse: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dr. Hope: Nothing on your mind.
Maryse: No.
Dr. Hope: And your..sex life. Seems a bit..open.
*She picked her words carefully. Maryse allowed a hand to rest on her cheek and grinned just slightly.*
Maryse: If you had a sex life, would you even worry about mine?
Dr. Hope: Well, my husband and I are just fine. I assure you. But we're here to talk about you. I understand you had an incident with a fan earlier today?
*Maryse rolled her eyes and used one of her hands in a "talking" motion.*
Maryse: That was an incident? I get called a whore all the time. It doesn't bother me. Except..
*She seemed to drop her attitude and her guard.*
Dr. Hope: Yes?
Maryse: ..maybe I'm just trying to be a powerful woman. Maybe I just have all this sex because it makes me feel powerful. Like I have some kind of control over men. I've been trying so, so hard to get noticed since I came here. To be mentioned alongside the men. To not be lumped in with these boring ass cookie cutters like Maria or Alicia Fox. Do you know how much I DON'T want to be mentioned in the same breath as people like them? If people see them and think I'm ANYTHING like that it just makes me want to vomit. They have their little spots but they never do anything memorable and they get content with mediocrity. It gets exhausting.
*Her posture slumped while she began to rub at the corners of her eyes*
Dr. Hope: What you want to do is admirable. But maybe you aren't going about it the best way. And Paul Heyman might not be the best influence. I've never really talked to you very much about your past. Are there any relationships that may have given you this mind set?
*She sighed heavily.*
Maryse: I've never been one to beg. But there was one guy. And I thought if I told him I loved him that would be enough. I mean, look at me. I'm beautiful. I should be able to get any guy on the planet. But not him. I wasn't enough. Maybe that's why I'm so dead set on being right up there with the men. So he can see how strong I am. And if people think I'm like Maria or whoever else..just some dingy, dull, broad..it..it..
*Her voice choked and she placed her hands over her face. Silence for a few moments before she dropped her hands and smirked.*
Maryse: ..was all bullshit. Everything I just said. None of that was true. I like having lots of sex because it's FUN! I like making lots of money so I can flaunt it! I don't care about women empowerment garbage. I just hate bitches like Maria and smacking them around passes time. I'm here to get rich and famous and I know just how to do it, Doc. And curtain jerking Diva's don't get filthy stinking rich! But Diva's who do shocking things and win titles and look soooo damn hot? They can get the world. And they can make it look easy.
*After laughing to herself Maryse stood, dusted her hands off and flicked her hair back.*
Maryse: Did we almost have a break through? HAH.
*Maryse left the office and headed off into the hallway while screaming something about how bad the catering was, her voice slipping between English and French.*