A Perfect Storm

[Cory]

per•fect storm | noun
A particularly bad or critical state of affairs, arising from a number of negative and unpredictable factors.

Hours before what many believed to be the actual marquee event of EBWF, Randy sat alone in what had been designated as the dressing room for himself and Adam. An event taking place a reasonable Uber drive away from his house, it was easy for him to arrive early and help out with some of the less involved tasks with setup. Rolling equipment into the arena, helping move set pieces, these were easy things to keep his mind off of the upcoming show. Anything to keep him out of his own brain. He wasn't needed at the moment, so he sat in his locker room, waiting for a scheduled interview with Renee. The bright fluorescent lights reflected off the shiny gold face of his EBWF World Championship. He eyed its luster briefly as he heard a knock on the door.

Randy Orton: It's open.

In stepped Renee, flanked by EBWF's resident senior cameraman, his camera already recording as Renee brought the mic to her lips. Randy took a deep breath. This interview wasn't going to be exactly like the usual one.

Renee Young: Afternoon, Randy. An exciting night, isn't it?

Randy Orton slowly stood up from his seat, gripping the EBWF World Championship belt in his hand. His tag team title was neatly folded on the bench next to him.

Randy Orton: It always is when Fanniversary rolls into town, Renee. Not to mention in St. Louis.

Renee Young: How have you been spending your weekend?

Randy Orton: Most of the time I've spent with my family, when not at my Fanniversary commitments. Breakfast with the Champions, EBWF Access, the EBWF Network and Sponsor Mixer, and so on, and so forth.

Renee Young: I imagine you had to run around a lot as the face of our company.

Randy Orton: And a handsome face it is, Renee. I've been doing this my entire career in EBWF. It's nothing new for me. Whether I am World Champion or not, I am still the guy EBWF trots out there to put its best foot forward.

Renee Young: You say "whether or not you are World Champion" Randy, as if you may be expecting a sea change here. Do you see a situation where The Miz walks out as EBWF World Champion?

Randy smirked.

Randy Orton: This might come as a shock to you Renee, but a small, infinitesimal part of me has respect for The Miz and his accomplishments in EBWF.

Renee feigned shock.

Renee Young: Randy Orton acknowledging respect for someone not named Edge? Now that's a headline.

Randy rolled his eyes.

Randy Orton: You're right, I take it back.

Renee chuckled and shook her head.

Randy Orton: No, but seriously. I know what The Miz is going to say. Because it's nothing that hasn't been said 1,000 times before. But for once, I'm actually going to change up the narrative. There's no reason anyone should doubt The Miz. He's been in this business long enough, and he's savvy and shrewd enough, that no one should be surprised if he adds a few more titles to his accolades before he hangs it up. As far as active EBWF royalty goes, it's me, Edge, and The Miz. That's just a fact.

Renee Young: I sense a big "but" coming.

Randy looked behind him.

Randy Orton: Is Paul Heyman on the way or something?

Renee Young: Stop it.

Randy Orton: There is no but here. The reality is that I'm the EBWF World Champion, and no matter how many compliments I heap onto The Miz, so matter how much respect he is due, the worst thing that can happen to a superstar is to face Randy Orton in the most important match, at the most important venue in EBWF. This is Fanniversary, Renee. This is St. Louis. And when it comes to being clutch, I am THE name in pro-wrestling. When the lights are brightest, I win. When the opponent is the strongest he's ever been, I win. This is the moment where I'm at my best, and as much as I have respect for what The Miz has done, it's still me and everyone else.

Renee Young: You definitely seem confident going into your one-on-one match with challenger The Miz. But what if it's not one-on-one.

Randy Orton: You mean, what if the Miz and Paul Heyman are in cahoots?

Renee nodded.

Renee Young: On the surface, it certainly looks like Miz spurned Paul Heyman on television.

Randy Orton: Yeah. The thought has occurred to me. Maybe I'm fighting an uphill battle. Maybe in addition to the Miz, I have to deal with...

Randy flexed his jaw, sensing something behind him. He slowly turned around and looked down at Paul Heyman, who had his signature toothy grin on full display.

Paul Heyman: You were saying?

Randy Orton: I was actually just talking about you, Paul.

Paul smiled, unusually full of himself.

Paul Heyman: None of it good, I hope. I just wanted to stop by, and give you some final guidance as you enter the last moments of your glorious World Championship reign.

Randy sighed.

Randy Orton: Do you ever have anything interesting to say, or is it just bad guy tropes all of the time?

Paul laughed, it seemed nothing was going to sour his mood.

Paul Heyman: On the contrary, dear Champion, everything I say is important. Everything I say is of consequence. Unlike you, I do not speak unless there is something worth saying.

Randy Orton: Wait, am I in froopyland or something? In what universe is that a true statement?

Paul Heyman: I've been listening in on this little interview of yours, Randy. And I love that you're painting this narrative that the Miz and I could be in league with each other, with the intent on screwing you out of the EBWF World Championship. It is low hanging headline fodder, Randy, and you know it. And you should know better. I have no existing deal with the Miz. I am not his advocate, his manager, or anything. I will be watching the match from back here, VERY interested in the outcome, but uninvolved nonetheless.

Randy Orton: Yeah. I know what you mean by uninvolved. You can be "uninvolved" when your puppy dog The Fiend shows up and meddles with my business.

Paul smirked.

Paul Heyman: Randy, if I didn't know any better, I would think you were creating a narrative to explain your upcoming loss away to phantom enemy.

Randy Orton: Paul, I could lose 5 more times to the Miz and I would still be the greatest talent that this company has ever put on the TV. My legacy is sealed. I don't need to explain anything away. But I do face realities. Realities like the one where you have been obsessed with me since last year. Realities where you are so irritated that I don't need you, that you have done everything in your power to torpedo my EBWF World Championship title reign and you have failed at every. Single. Turn. You are insecure, you are petty, and worst of all...

Randy smirked.

Randy Orton: You are entirely ineffective. You tried to coach Roman Reigns and he flamed out. Brock Lesnar's gone. Every person that takes you on has come out worse because of it. If the Miz does end up making a deal with you, then he's dumber than I took him for.

Randy's eyes narrowed and he tensed up as he heard maniacal laughter emanating from a distance. His smirk faded as he turned to face the source of the unnerving cackling.

Funhouse Bray: Oh, Randy Randy Randy! You really put Paul into his place!

Randy stepped towards Wyatt, his jaw flexing agitatedly.

Randy Orton: I'm begging you to give me a reason to drop you.

Bray laughed again.

Funhouse Bray: I'm not here to fight, you silly goose! I'm here to let you know that I am rooting for you tonight against the Miz! I love the story of the fighting champion! The heroic...

Randy Orton: Why. Are. You. Here.

Funhouse Bray: I'm here for a good reason, Randy. I legitimately want to see you do well, tonight! There's millions of families out there that are rooting for Randy Orton! I don't want to see them disappointed. That would make me sad. And I know that you think I was involved with that unfortunate incident with Edge. And I just wanted to say that I--

Randy had had enough. Wyatt wasn't able to finish his sentence before a fist collided with his jaw and he was sent stumbling back. Randy was on him in an instant, hailing down punches on the disturbed Funhouse host, Bray Wyatt. Renee, suddenly alarmed for her own safety, backed away as the camera focused in on Randy rolling around exchanging blows with Wyatt. The sound of frenzied laughter came from Wyatt as Randy mercilessly connected with punch after punch. Several staff members, security members, and training staff crowded around the melee and grabbed Randy, pulling him off the bloody Wyatt. Wyatt was still cackling uncontrollably as Randy flailed, trying to wrest himself away from the grip of multiple staff members keeping him from getting back on top of the laughing psychopath in front of him.

Randy Orton: COME ON! I will END you!

Wyatt slowly got up, his blood dropping down his face as he chuckled.

Funhouse Bray: My, my, my! What a temper! Still rooting for you, big guy! Knock 'em dead out there!

With that Wyatt left, still wiping blood off his face as he disappeared down the hallway, Randy's icy gaze followed him. Heyman took his opportunity to slink away, not wanting to also incur the wrath of the Silent Assassin. Renee was frozen, watching on as everything slowly got back to normal, Randy no longer struggling against the 7 men holding him back. Finally he put his hands up, signaling that he was no longer going to do anything, and they released him. Randy walked over to Renee and put his hand out. She quickly handed him the microphone and he grasped Drew's camera and pointed it right as his face, raising the microphone to speak.

Randy Orton: Miz, I'm going to make this real simple. You're a smart guy. You wouldn't still be in this business if you weren't. I want you to think about what you just saw.

His jaw was clenched, his eyes were fierce. Randy was still incensed.

Randy Orton: There aren't many guys in the back to stack up to you and me when it comes to success in EBWF. We have both had our moments in the sun, and we've both taken full advantage of it. So I'm saying this to you not as a superior, not as a "guy on a different level", but as a peer. As an equal. If you're considering a deal with that slimy piece of garbage Paul Heyman and his pet freak, put it out of your head right now. That's not a request. You've done plenty in this business without Paul Heyman's help, and he's just petty enough to use you to get to me. I want you to think about this carefully, and deliberately. I can help you, Miz. Allow me to help you with your pros and cons.

He gestured to his right.

Randy Orton: Pros. One - Paul Heyman is greasy turd who will capitulate to anything if you just show him your fist. Two - He's a coward, and he can be your little yes man. Three - He kind of looks like the Penguin, which is pretty funny at times. Four - He can fetch you coffee and whatnot, since he doesn't really do any actual managing.

Randy gestured to his left.

Randy Orton: And now, cons. One - He'll turn on you the moment it's convenient for him. Two - He will never get you an opportunity you can't get yourself.

Randy smirked.

Randy Orton: And finally, Three - Me. I am the biggest drawback to you becoming a "Paul Heyman Guy". If you do, not only will I lose respect for you, but I will also hunt you down and end you, just as quickly and just as decisively as I am going to end him and his pet. I don't care if you're World Champion or not. If you align yourself with Paul, I will make it my sole mission to ensure it's the last mistake you ever make.

He shook his head.

Randy Orton: Y'know, the build up to Fanniversary has been the perfect storm of complete shit, hasn't it? Paul Heyman gunning for me, bringing in his attack dog, and now the Miz cashing in his prized Gateway Championship to get his shot. If and when I survive this, and I will, it will only be more proof that I am the greatest champion this company has ever seen. And if I lose tonight because the Miz signed a deal with the devil, I will focus all of my energy on making certain that the Miz regrets that decision for the rest of his goddamn life. And that's not a prediction... that's a spoiler.

Randy started to walk off, but as he did he paused, wagging his finger.

Randy Orton: You know, I just thought of something. People like to say the same things about me every year. That I'm lazy, that I'm phoning it in, that I'm only half-assing my career. And yet, I've been a champion for 274 days. Which, as it turns out, is the same amount of days that I held this title back in 2010. If I beat the Miz tonight, I will break my own record as the longest reigning EBWF World Champion in history.

He smirked again.

Randy Orton: If that's me phoning it in, imagine what I'm capable of when I'm focused. Think about that, Miz. Think long and hard about that when you're considering Paul's offer. It might be the last decision you ever make.

Randy stared intensely into the camera as he dropped the microphone onto the ground and walked off, leaving the chaotic scene as the camera faded to black.