The Top vs. The Top of the Bottom.
Posted: Mon Feb 21, 2022 11:55 pm
[i]The Miz had done it. He got through 3 stages of hell vs. Chris Jericho en route to becoming a 6 time EBWF Champion. His entire essence was that of someone who was completely locked in this time around. He knew that beating Chris, would take a focus level and effort that was superior to anything he had done to date in his career. Miz respected Chris, and brought that respect into taking this match extremely serious. His affiliation with Heyman, continued to be talked about, but as Miz stated in his last promo, it was more of a mutual respect than Miz "needing" Heyman to succeed. Miz looked at Paul as the best in the business at what he did, and Paul looked at Miz the same way. The EBWF has been defined by it's top stars, and Miz had been a mainstay in this position for the better part of the last decade. On Warfare he would be back in in ring action against the Breakout Champion "King" Xavier Woods. Miz obviously was always very confident in his in ring ability and stature in the company, but going up against someone who quite clearly was detached from reality, would be a major change in Miz' approach to the match. It would be beyond interesting to hear what Miz had to say going into this tilt.
The scene opened up to a panned out shot of a limo driving down an interstate highway. The camera quickly cut to inside said limo, and there sat The Miz, Paul Heyman, and Mickie James. All 3 were dressed to the nines, with Heyman and Miz both rocking 3 piece suits and Mickie sporting a very expensive low cut dress. Miz' EBWF World Title sat in between he and Heyman. All 3 sipped champagne as the limo traveled to their final destination of EBWF Warfare. After several beats of no dialouge the Miz laughed almost letting champagne spill out of his mouth. Heyman broke the silence.
Paul Heyman: What is it, my champion?
The Miz let a smile form across his face.
The Miz: I just can't get over the fact that Xavier Woods like gets to do what he does on television. Week in and week out... he comes out in front of all the friggin idiots that watch our show, and he acts like the Breakout Title.. is literally the most important thing in the business. Does he not realize that the Breakout Title.. is essentially like speed dating for EBWF superstars. Like usually you fight for it.. then you get fired. I really don't know what to think of someone that like defines themselves by being the champion of dudes who get fired from this company. It'd be like being proud of being the manager at a Wal-Mart. Ok you are the top guy.. in a company that literally HIRES ANYONE. Like drug addicts.. dead beat dads.. fat single moms who spend their free time at the penny slots of the local casino.. everyone can work at Wal-Mart.. and like if you're the manager of that Wal-Mart.. are you really proud? Or are you like tying rope into a nuce.. and just staring at it.. wondering "should I?" Like honestly Xavier Woods.. may be the most detached guy from reality that I have ever witnessed in my entire life. I just watched his segment.. and like he and Kofi went to a broken down house .. and said it was the last place I lived.. it's like I'm laughing.. but I'm not laughing.. because this is the thing that both he and Kofi sat down and decided was going to be their approach to facing me. This is what they decided was going to "get under my skin." I am the biggest thing in the history of this company.. and they resort to like clearly facetious... circus humor.. at my expense.. that even my biggest detractors would find overly and utterly stupid and ridiculous.
Heyman sipped his champange and nodded.
Paul Heyman: My champion- if I may.
Miz took a sip of champagne and nodded.
Paul Heyman: Miz- when you've been in the business as long as you and I have. You start to notice patterns and trends of the people who inhabit it. You start to get a sense in each company of who the haves and the have nots are. When a have-not faces a have.. sometimes their default setting is to be as egregious and as juvenille as they can possibly be.. to do WHATEVER it takes to get a rise out of the haves. That is what I sense here in this upcoming match. Xavier Woods is a cooke.. he's a looney tune.. he's a cartoon character.. and he knows that he has never and will never have any business being in the ring with the likes of you. So what does he do, he goes as FAR OUT into left field as he possibly can.. hell.. I bet he thinks you should be a part of the Breakout Championship tournament.. despite the fact that you are a 6 time world champion. This man is quite simply living on Mars.. while the rest of us here on earth are quite frankly underwhelmed by this match-up to say the least.. but in a way we are all relatively excited about the fact that FINALLY.. FINALLY.. Xavier Woods will go up against someone who isn't swirling around in the toilet seat of this company. Finally Xavier Woods is going up against someone that isn't a "just show up and you win" opponent. In fact, my champion, it is quite the opposite. Xavier Woods is going up against someone at Warfare that he simply CAN NOT BEAT.. even on his BEST DAY.. and your worst. Even if you were viciously hungover.. or had one leg amputated.. you would not fall victim to this circus clown and his antics. LONG GONE.. are the days of you looking past opponents.. and Xavier Woods is going to be yet another casualty of an overly locked in.. overly focused.. SIX TIME.. EBWF World Champion on Monday Night.
The Miz sipped his champagne once more and nodded.
The Miz: I don't want to come off as a guy with no sense of humor, Paul. I mean I get it.. Xavier Woods schtick is cute.. it's endearing.. it's supposed to make people smile. Kofi Kingston.. same thing.. like wow.. both of you guys are still on TV.. it's a feel good story.. like it's a story.. and it makes me feel good. However, one thing I don't feel good about.. is the fact that this quack-a-dactyl thinks that he legitamately has a shot of beating me. I don't like that someone like Xavier.. can literally with a straight face look into the camera and think.. and really believe that he NOT ONLY has any business being in the ring with the EBWF Champion.. but that he could actually beat him 1-2-3 in the middle of the ring. This is something that I can't take, Paul, I can't take it, I can't stomach it.. and I won't accept it. This is the state of the union address on the EBWF. When I beat Chris Jericho in three stages of hell.. it was a statement to the rest of this company.. that there is a NEW ERA.. in this company. An era where Chris Jericho can't rise out of any room with chocolate cake all over his face and get a title shot. It's an era where someone new is going to have to rise to the forefront and give me a challenge that will actually keep me interested. A guy who parades around with his buddy doing slap stick comedy at the expense of those FAR SUPERIOR to him.. isn't quite what I'm talking about.. it's not quite what I'm referring to.. and the fact that I'm being subjected to facing someone like this.. is going to lead to me making a pretty loud.. pretty clear.. pretty painful and cringe worthy statement.. when I beat Xavier Woods to a point where he may have to relinquish the breakout title.. because it'd be too hard to defend from a hospital bed. I'm NOT OK with being talked down to by someone who is SO FAR down on the totem pole here that like 4 people had to pass his words up the ladder and I heard what he said about me at the end of a friggin assembly line. Xavier Woods confident? Xavier Woods.. arrogant? Against me? I think I speak for everyone with a brain cell who watches our show when I say.. PFFT.
Mickie James and Paul Heyman echoed Miz.
Mickie James and Paul Heyman: PFFT.
Mickie James: I actually think it's kind of cute that he's going on live TV and ACTUALLY acting like he can beat you.
The Miz smiled.
The Miz: Cute like how?
Mickie James: It's like when an NBA player holds a basketball camp and some little kid gets to play them one on one in front of the whole camp. Like you know the kid can't win.. but you're still like "aw"
The Miz and Heyman both smiled at the analogy.
The Miz: It's not a bad analogy babe. Xavier Woods is that little kid.. he's that little kid that at the camp.. may be getting buckets. May be making shots.. may be scoring points against other kids who suck. The Breakout Championship is literally the equivalent of a bad basketball camp. Sure you may be scoring. .you may be having success against other little nerds who can't play. However, who I am.. who I AM in this scenario is the NBA Player profitting of of the camp. I'm Michael Jordan at the Jordan Basketball Camp.. and Xavier woods is the little nerd who's dad wrote the biggest check to get to play one on one against Michael. I'm 6'6 from North Carolina.. and you are a little reject who's 12 years old and everyone thinks it's cute you're actually going to try and play against the friggin GOAT. You can't win here Xavier.. I'm WAY too good.. I'm WAY too talented.. I'm WAY OUT OF YOUR MOTHER EFFING LEAGUE. I didn't become the World Champion because I'm good at friggin kick ball. I mean I'm excellent at kick ball.. but that's unrelated. I'm the World Champion.. because unlike you.. I excel.. I WIN.. facing the very best this business has to offer. I have faced and BEATEN.. EVERYONE that there is to beat.. and my victory against you on Warfare.. will not make that list. You will go on my list of "well DUH" victories like Enzo Amore.. or friggin Glacier all those years ago. You are not even on my radar.. and I don't consider a win against you anything that is going to move the needle. Our match is literally confusing to anyone who follows our business. Why would the MIz and Xavier Woods be in the same ring at the same time.. unless I was doing a demonstration of how NOBODY in this business is good enough to face me.. and you just happened to be one of many that were in the ring as an example of that. You're a joke Xavier.. and I'm not laughing.. I'm instead so laser focused on dismantling you in front of the world.. so that maybe you can hop off that "mountain" you're on.. which is really a "mole hill" because you're literally the Champion of the people in the EBWF who freaking suck and you act like you're me. Well guess what Xavier.. you aren't me.. and at Warfare on Monday that's going to be abundantly clear.. when I humilate in front of your one fan.. and send you back to focusing on squaring off against the next crop of one match.. and then fired.. rejects that you've made a career of so far.
Heyman sipped champagne and nodded.
Paul Heyman: It has to be done.. an example has to be set. A statement has to be made.
The Miz brought it home.
The Miz: And that is exactly what I'm going to do Paul. I can't have people who literally aren't good enough to scrape gum of my shoe talking down to me. I need to be clear.. I need to be LOUD and clear.. that I.. I.. AM THE TRUE KING OF THIS BUSINESS. I can't even have ANYONE ELSE.. claiming to be that .. because it is complete and utter blashphemy.. I am the KING OF WRESTLING.. I am the man WHO'S RINGS NEED TO BE KISSED. I am the man.. who needs to be served.. who needs to be admired.. who needs to be worshipped.. and WHO NEEDS TO HAVE A LOT BETTER COMPETITION TO KEEP ME FREAKING INTERESTED. Xavier Woods.. cute act.. cute promo.. cute jokes.. but our match at Warfare is going be anything but cute. It's going to be grotesque.. it's going to be hard to watch.. it's going to be downright humilating for you and anyone who supports you. It's going to be a LOUD AND CLEAR STATEMENT.. that NOBODY LIKE YOU.. should talk to ANYONE like ME.. the way you have here. I'm going to BEAT SOME RESPECT INTO YOU XAVIER.. and it's going to hurt.. it's going to suck.. but it's completely 100 percent neccesary so that EVERYONE.. including you remembers their place here. Mine is at the top.. and you can be the top too... the top of the bottom.. and that's as HIGH.. as you'll ever freaking get here.. why you ask?
BECAUSE I'MMMMMMMMMMM THE MIZZZZZZZZZZZZ
AND I'MMMMMMMMMMMMM
AWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
The Miz, Mickie, and Paul all clinked their glasses together as the scene faded out.[/i]
The scene opened up to a panned out shot of a limo driving down an interstate highway. The camera quickly cut to inside said limo, and there sat The Miz, Paul Heyman, and Mickie James. All 3 were dressed to the nines, with Heyman and Miz both rocking 3 piece suits and Mickie sporting a very expensive low cut dress. Miz' EBWF World Title sat in between he and Heyman. All 3 sipped champagne as the limo traveled to their final destination of EBWF Warfare. After several beats of no dialouge the Miz laughed almost letting champagne spill out of his mouth. Heyman broke the silence.
Paul Heyman: What is it, my champion?
The Miz let a smile form across his face.
The Miz: I just can't get over the fact that Xavier Woods like gets to do what he does on television. Week in and week out... he comes out in front of all the friggin idiots that watch our show, and he acts like the Breakout Title.. is literally the most important thing in the business. Does he not realize that the Breakout Title.. is essentially like speed dating for EBWF superstars. Like usually you fight for it.. then you get fired. I really don't know what to think of someone that like defines themselves by being the champion of dudes who get fired from this company. It'd be like being proud of being the manager at a Wal-Mart. Ok you are the top guy.. in a company that literally HIRES ANYONE. Like drug addicts.. dead beat dads.. fat single moms who spend their free time at the penny slots of the local casino.. everyone can work at Wal-Mart.. and like if you're the manager of that Wal-Mart.. are you really proud? Or are you like tying rope into a nuce.. and just staring at it.. wondering "should I?" Like honestly Xavier Woods.. may be the most detached guy from reality that I have ever witnessed in my entire life. I just watched his segment.. and like he and Kofi went to a broken down house .. and said it was the last place I lived.. it's like I'm laughing.. but I'm not laughing.. because this is the thing that both he and Kofi sat down and decided was going to be their approach to facing me. This is what they decided was going to "get under my skin." I am the biggest thing in the history of this company.. and they resort to like clearly facetious... circus humor.. at my expense.. that even my biggest detractors would find overly and utterly stupid and ridiculous.
Heyman sipped his champange and nodded.
Paul Heyman: My champion- if I may.
Miz took a sip of champagne and nodded.
Paul Heyman: Miz- when you've been in the business as long as you and I have. You start to notice patterns and trends of the people who inhabit it. You start to get a sense in each company of who the haves and the have nots are. When a have-not faces a have.. sometimes their default setting is to be as egregious and as juvenille as they can possibly be.. to do WHATEVER it takes to get a rise out of the haves. That is what I sense here in this upcoming match. Xavier Woods is a cooke.. he's a looney tune.. he's a cartoon character.. and he knows that he has never and will never have any business being in the ring with the likes of you. So what does he do, he goes as FAR OUT into left field as he possibly can.. hell.. I bet he thinks you should be a part of the Breakout Championship tournament.. despite the fact that you are a 6 time world champion. This man is quite simply living on Mars.. while the rest of us here on earth are quite frankly underwhelmed by this match-up to say the least.. but in a way we are all relatively excited about the fact that FINALLY.. FINALLY.. Xavier Woods will go up against someone who isn't swirling around in the toilet seat of this company. Finally Xavier Woods is going up against someone that isn't a "just show up and you win" opponent. In fact, my champion, it is quite the opposite. Xavier Woods is going up against someone at Warfare that he simply CAN NOT BEAT.. even on his BEST DAY.. and your worst. Even if you were viciously hungover.. or had one leg amputated.. you would not fall victim to this circus clown and his antics. LONG GONE.. are the days of you looking past opponents.. and Xavier Woods is going to be yet another casualty of an overly locked in.. overly focused.. SIX TIME.. EBWF World Champion on Monday Night.
The Miz sipped his champagne once more and nodded.
The Miz: I don't want to come off as a guy with no sense of humor, Paul. I mean I get it.. Xavier Woods schtick is cute.. it's endearing.. it's supposed to make people smile. Kofi Kingston.. same thing.. like wow.. both of you guys are still on TV.. it's a feel good story.. like it's a story.. and it makes me feel good. However, one thing I don't feel good about.. is the fact that this quack-a-dactyl thinks that he legitamately has a shot of beating me. I don't like that someone like Xavier.. can literally with a straight face look into the camera and think.. and really believe that he NOT ONLY has any business being in the ring with the EBWF Champion.. but that he could actually beat him 1-2-3 in the middle of the ring. This is something that I can't take, Paul, I can't take it, I can't stomach it.. and I won't accept it. This is the state of the union address on the EBWF. When I beat Chris Jericho in three stages of hell.. it was a statement to the rest of this company.. that there is a NEW ERA.. in this company. An era where Chris Jericho can't rise out of any room with chocolate cake all over his face and get a title shot. It's an era where someone new is going to have to rise to the forefront and give me a challenge that will actually keep me interested. A guy who parades around with his buddy doing slap stick comedy at the expense of those FAR SUPERIOR to him.. isn't quite what I'm talking about.. it's not quite what I'm referring to.. and the fact that I'm being subjected to facing someone like this.. is going to lead to me making a pretty loud.. pretty clear.. pretty painful and cringe worthy statement.. when I beat Xavier Woods to a point where he may have to relinquish the breakout title.. because it'd be too hard to defend from a hospital bed. I'm NOT OK with being talked down to by someone who is SO FAR down on the totem pole here that like 4 people had to pass his words up the ladder and I heard what he said about me at the end of a friggin assembly line. Xavier Woods confident? Xavier Woods.. arrogant? Against me? I think I speak for everyone with a brain cell who watches our show when I say.. PFFT.
Mickie James and Paul Heyman echoed Miz.
Mickie James and Paul Heyman: PFFT.
Mickie James: I actually think it's kind of cute that he's going on live TV and ACTUALLY acting like he can beat you.
The Miz smiled.
The Miz: Cute like how?
Mickie James: It's like when an NBA player holds a basketball camp and some little kid gets to play them one on one in front of the whole camp. Like you know the kid can't win.. but you're still like "aw"
The Miz and Heyman both smiled at the analogy.
The Miz: It's not a bad analogy babe. Xavier Woods is that little kid.. he's that little kid that at the camp.. may be getting buckets. May be making shots.. may be scoring points against other kids who suck. The Breakout Championship is literally the equivalent of a bad basketball camp. Sure you may be scoring. .you may be having success against other little nerds who can't play. However, who I am.. who I AM in this scenario is the NBA Player profitting of of the camp. I'm Michael Jordan at the Jordan Basketball Camp.. and Xavier woods is the little nerd who's dad wrote the biggest check to get to play one on one against Michael. I'm 6'6 from North Carolina.. and you are a little reject who's 12 years old and everyone thinks it's cute you're actually going to try and play against the friggin GOAT. You can't win here Xavier.. I'm WAY too good.. I'm WAY too talented.. I'm WAY OUT OF YOUR MOTHER EFFING LEAGUE. I didn't become the World Champion because I'm good at friggin kick ball. I mean I'm excellent at kick ball.. but that's unrelated. I'm the World Champion.. because unlike you.. I excel.. I WIN.. facing the very best this business has to offer. I have faced and BEATEN.. EVERYONE that there is to beat.. and my victory against you on Warfare.. will not make that list. You will go on my list of "well DUH" victories like Enzo Amore.. or friggin Glacier all those years ago. You are not even on my radar.. and I don't consider a win against you anything that is going to move the needle. Our match is literally confusing to anyone who follows our business. Why would the MIz and Xavier Woods be in the same ring at the same time.. unless I was doing a demonstration of how NOBODY in this business is good enough to face me.. and you just happened to be one of many that were in the ring as an example of that. You're a joke Xavier.. and I'm not laughing.. I'm instead so laser focused on dismantling you in front of the world.. so that maybe you can hop off that "mountain" you're on.. which is really a "mole hill" because you're literally the Champion of the people in the EBWF who freaking suck and you act like you're me. Well guess what Xavier.. you aren't me.. and at Warfare on Monday that's going to be abundantly clear.. when I humilate in front of your one fan.. and send you back to focusing on squaring off against the next crop of one match.. and then fired.. rejects that you've made a career of so far.
Heyman sipped champagne and nodded.
Paul Heyman: It has to be done.. an example has to be set. A statement has to be made.
The Miz brought it home.
The Miz: And that is exactly what I'm going to do Paul. I can't have people who literally aren't good enough to scrape gum of my shoe talking down to me. I need to be clear.. I need to be LOUD and clear.. that I.. I.. AM THE TRUE KING OF THIS BUSINESS. I can't even have ANYONE ELSE.. claiming to be that .. because it is complete and utter blashphemy.. I am the KING OF WRESTLING.. I am the man WHO'S RINGS NEED TO BE KISSED. I am the man.. who needs to be served.. who needs to be admired.. who needs to be worshipped.. and WHO NEEDS TO HAVE A LOT BETTER COMPETITION TO KEEP ME FREAKING INTERESTED. Xavier Woods.. cute act.. cute promo.. cute jokes.. but our match at Warfare is going be anything but cute. It's going to be grotesque.. it's going to be hard to watch.. it's going to be downright humilating for you and anyone who supports you. It's going to be a LOUD AND CLEAR STATEMENT.. that NOBODY LIKE YOU.. should talk to ANYONE like ME.. the way you have here. I'm going to BEAT SOME RESPECT INTO YOU XAVIER.. and it's going to hurt.. it's going to suck.. but it's completely 100 percent neccesary so that EVERYONE.. including you remembers their place here. Mine is at the top.. and you can be the top too... the top of the bottom.. and that's as HIGH.. as you'll ever freaking get here.. why you ask?
BECAUSE I'MMMMMMMMMMM THE MIZZZZZZZZZZZZ
AND I'MMMMMMMMMMMMM
AWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
The Miz, Mickie, and Paul all clinked their glasses together as the scene faded out.[/i]