Motor City Starter Pistols

[TheDynasty]

As the crowd settled in for pre-show dark matches, an explosion of excitement from the crowd almost deafened everyone in attendance as "Huka Blues," the theme music of Detroit's own Sabu echoed throughout the arena. The excitement, however, was short lived, as a familiar voice spoke into a microphone.

MJF: "Whoops, sorry, pressed the wrong button. Guys in the truck, hit MY music please."

"Better Than You" hit the speakers and the crowd began to boo as MJF stepped through the curtain onto the stage wearing a Toronto Maple leafs jersey.

MJF: "Cut my music, cut my music. What up, Mishitgan! I've got it on good authority from your lady wives that in Michigan, Caesar isn't the only one that's little, if you catch Daddy's drift. So why don't all you neckbearded mouth-breathers head on back to 8 Mile, while I shower your wives, daughters and sisters with so much of Daddy's DNA, a blacklight will make it look like they've been to an ICP show.

Johnny Gargano, you walk around here like you're actually relevant. Sorry to break it to, Johnny, but here in the Motor City, I'm Henry Ford and you're John DeLorean. Sure, you'll have a cult following of nerdy incels behind you, but I'm the people's choice that they keep paying to see. You're nothing more than a novelty, a throwback to yesteryear.

But cars aren't the only thing Detroit is famous for. We can't forget Motown, and I'd be more than happy to welcome you to Hitsville, U.S.A., Johnny, because just like Diana Ross, I am Supreme...you, though? Even Stevie Wonder could see that you aren't. Tonight you're gonna find out what it means to R.E.S.P.E.C.T. me, as just like Motown, I land hit after hit after hit, right into your face. You're gonna feel like Primo Carnera after 6 rounds with Joe Louis...or Kim Mathers after 6 rounds with Marshall...because my name is Maxwell Jacob Friedman, and I'm better than you, and you know it."

"Better Than You" hit again as MJF headed backstage to prepare for his match.