No Survivor (Tam Nakano)

[Utami]

After hitting play, the video opens with an incredibly polished hype package for Last Survivor. From the Liberty Bell to Independence Hall to the Wells Fargo Center itself, it's all backed by “Last Survivor" by UNSECRET & Nilka. Soon there's a roll call of every woman advertised for the women's Last Survivor match. With each new face the footage gets grainier and grainier, the music more and more distorted. Just as we can barely make out the faces of Liv Morgan, Alexa Bliss and Becky Lynch, a familiar distorted voice speaks.

“tHE fOllOWInG meSsaGE Is BroUGHt tO yOu bY OeDO taI.”

The Oedo Tai logo appears on the screen as the rest of the video goes to static. For a few moments ‘Oedo Ranbu’ is heard playing softly in the background. When the video finally cuts to full video again, it's to show Tam Nakano in her ring gear sitting on the hood of a souped up car. Himeka’s nearby, her clothes black, purple and red.

TAM NAKANO: My oh my, it's that time of year again isn't it? A new year underway wiping the slate clear and endless possibilities for what might unfold. An event that's been part of EBWF under one name of another for its whole life. And a match where anything can happen, anyone can show up and everyone whose music hits has a chance to punch their ticket to Fallout and a shot at that beautiful championship. AREN'T YOU EXCITED?!

Her gag reflex almost kicks in at the overwhelming positivity she's forced out. She waggles a chiding finger at the camera instead.

TAM NAKANO: All the girls in the back THINK they have that chance, but just like always they're just deluding themselves. It must be exhausting starting a new year with such high hopes and unfounded confidence that this year is going to be different. That this is the year they're going to outlast 19 other women and write their name in the history books. Sure they've done nothing in the past year to back up that confidence, but good for them for developing the skills to lie to themselves so effectively! It's the only success any of them will enjoy this year.

She laughs at her own snide assessment.

TAM NAKANO: Just because the calendar rolled over doesn't mean that anything has changed. I look at the girls in the locker room and it makes me want to puke. New year, same old trash as always! A bunch of second tier, B+ players who think they're hot stuff because they can beat each other. It's funny, and I thank them all for making me laugh so much for the past few months. What's even funnier is the terrified looks on their faces, the absolute despair I see every time their hopes get crushed under the weight of reality.

Her expression grows more and more excited as she speaks.

TAM NAKANO: The reality is that you're still the same as when I came back in 2022. Your horrendous lack of talent dragged this whole division down, and I've spent the whole time lifting it up. At first it was just me, alone, making up for your failures as the unbeatable champion. Now I have help, I have my family - Oedo Tai. And we're determined to hand out the beatings until you all improve. You'd think that the girls in the back would all be used to it, but honestly they're just too stupid to realize that their arms are too short to box with a goddess.

Tam whips her hair back dramatically and the camera zooms in a little closer.

TAM NAKANO: Which is why I'm so EXCITED for Last Survivor. All of the pretenders, has beens and never weres gathered in one place just for Tam. Nowhere to run, nowhere to hide from their superior. This is my first time in a Last Survivor match, because while the rest of you were brawling over scraps I was fighting for the championship. It's true! I've already beaten everyone in this match, or proven that I'm better than them. And to celebrate my first appearance in a Last Survivor match, I'm going to treat you all to a reminder of how much better I am than any of you.

She slides off the car and twirls in place.

TAM NAKANO: All of you have big hopes and dreams, and all of you say you're willing to do whatever it takes to earn your shot. Unfortunately for you, Tam is here and Oedo Tai will all be joining me. Some of you think that just because you got lucky against us ONCE that we're not a threat. It's going to be an excruciatingly painful lesson for every last one of you, but it's necessary. Maybe one of you will turn into a diamond capable of matching my - our shine after we crush you harder than you've ever been crushed. Maybe after we put the entire roster through hell, women's wrestling in EBWF will finally get back to the level it used to be.

Tam chuckles at the very idea of anyone exceeding her expectations.

TAM NAKANO: But I doubt it. Even if one of you does somehow go toe to toe with us for a while, Oedo Tai runs this place. Eventually you'll crumble under the force of our attacks. Last Survivor is going to be a war with every woman on her own. Everyone EXCEPT Oedo Tai. We're going to dominate you all just like we always have. Just like I have since I came back in July 2022. You can all step up, but we'll cut you down as soon as you do. Give us a workout if you want, but the end result will be exactly the same: Oedo Tai are the last women standing.

She motions to Himeka dramatically.

TAM NAKANO: Sorry for that spoiler, but you've all seen this show before. Maybe we'll just declare ourselves the joint winners and beat the hell out of whoever's got a hold of MY beautiful championship. Last time I held it, I made it the title scene the hottest in the entire sport for 365 days. Since my first EBWF run I've held it for almost 400. Once it comes home, it's going to stay home forever. But to get it back, I have to murder every last one of you. I guess that's just what I'll have to do.

Tam tilts her head to the side, grinning coquettishly.

TAM NAKANO: When Oedo Tai arrives in that ring in Philadelphia, it's over for all of you. No one will survive the wrath of the Final Boss of EBWF. Because while all of you hate me..

She taps her chin playfully.

TAM NAKANO: You'll NEVER be better than me. And you'll NEVER be better than Oedo Tai.

Tam flashes a nasty smile, eyes full of malice as ‘Senbonzakura’ plays. Himeka smiles demurely and flexes her muscles. Then as suddenly as it began, the promo fades into the Oedo Tai logo again.