Attendre et Espérer

[NeoBiishikiGun]

On the rails that go through a sea of lush green, goes a compact but frilly train. The scenery, as beautiful as it is, looks desolate, like it stands in a place between time and space, a place between dreams and reality.

But nonetheless, inside this clickety-clacker is someone who you might expect takes rides like these. On the table in front of her is a homely breakfast set-up, mostly eaten. Next to the ansable of the food … is the neatly-folded EBWF Women’s Championship.. Recognizing that it’s the time to speak, Sakisama looks at the camera and her mouth curls up into a catty smirk.

Sakisama: “Out of all the men, women and fine folk who wished to identify otherwise that had the pleasure of being kept as my esteemed company, I found Lady Luck to be the most fickle of mistresses. For you see, there is no soul in this world as free as her, as prone to fly away and find herself new muses so often. No one understands how she decides to operate. Sometimes, she decides to stay for a while, sometimes she helps you massively in one way but then decides to meddle in your affairs in more unfortunate directions the next time you feel her presence. She flees and comes back at her own leisure, she dictates her own pace. For that, I’ve always hated relying on luck throughout my life, yet I did benefit from her services on several occasions. To deny something as natural as this would be so unbecoming of an honest Lady like me, therefore, I deny not.”

Her gaze turns curious and her focus looks like it’s trying to catch a fleeting dream of hers.

Sakisama: “Maybe one day … I will finally get to solve this seemingly impossible equation, work out her inner mechanisms and map out her entire being so that I get to keep her for myself forever, as a Lady with the power, beauty and grace of me always deserves the best of everything, that includes the permanent companionship of my fellow Lady of four-leaf clovers and ladybugs. Maybe one day … I will show her that there is nothing in this world that deserves her services as much as me, so that she will stick by my side forever and always to watch me as I purge this world of all its ugliness, misery and misfortune.”

A dejected sigh then falls from her lips, she even breaks eye-contact with the camera during this.

Sakisama: “But alas, today is not that fateful day. And honestly, I don’t even know what day that will be. It remains an evergreen goal of mine, but it’s not a goal that has any sort of relationship with the goals I have about my care and handling of the garden we’ve grown to call EBWF.”

Spreading her arms wide, a gesture is made by Mademoiselle. A wide gesture of inclusion, like she owns everything that she is including and referring to, like EBWF itself.

Sakisama: “By all intents and purposes, I am the one true Goddess that runs EBWF’s women’s division. Quite frankly, I have been running it ever since I stepped foot into the landscape of this company. I brought the most feared faction to an end in one night. I have enlightened the cruelest of villains and the most valiant of heroes all the same. With this shiny gold title displaying my priceless name, it makes my statements undeniable. Even if my veneration didn’t help open your eyes to it … this championship makes it more than official: I am the head gardener in charge and anyone who wants to step out of line, grow beyond their pasture or defy the natural order of things has to answer to me sooner rather than later.”

She possessively clutches to her title, getting it off the table and onto her lap.

Sakisama: “And my darlings, my lovelies, my children, my flowers … unlike Lady Luck, I am anything but fickle. You will come to find that my hands are the steadiest of anyone you will ever meet in a wrestling ring. Lady Luck has her own complicated agenda, but mine is very simple. And to implement and maintain it, I don’t need no luck. I don’t need to get lucky and happen to just grab the right briefcase for my affairs to be sorted.”

A disapproving gaze is now directed at the camera.

Sakisama: “Simply, it is horrendous to see the right to step in the same ring with me, the EBWF Women’s Champion, being earned by nothing but gambling. Picking one of the three identical briefcases and just hoping that you picked the right one. The foolish might try to assert that managing to get your hands on one of the briefcases in a match where the number of choices were less than the number of competitors is an accomplishment on its own … but when one of those paths is significantly worse than taking no briefcases in the first place, then that just means that what you are doing is pure, unadulterated gambling. A game of luck, but no skill or power.”

She shakes her head, making her displeasure even clearer with how her next challenger came to be.

Sakisama: “What Maika did was not an accomplishment. Maika did not earn a shot at my championship. Yet, I can’t help but find it amusing that this is indeed the way to get an opportunity in Maika Style. It is very, very Maika to just stumble her way into the right briefcase. It is very her to just keep shoving herself to my vicinity over and over again.“

A tone of contempt now fills her usually chipper or serene tones.

Sakisama: “I’d try to sit back and take pleasure in this situation, but honestly, the humour in this affair is not that strong.”

She flicks her hair back, adjusts the title on her lap and adjusts her hat.

Sakisama: “And every single time, I think to myself that this is the last time I will be dealing with that particular vermin. Every single time, I think to myself that I have said everything there is to say about Maika Style. Yet … every single time … she pops back up. She gives me more material. She sinks into depths that I didn’t even know was possible. I kick her head in, she pops off again to be the ‘equalizer’. I beat and recruit the woman she was supposed to equalize for, she gambles her way for a title shot.”

The sting in her tone continues to be more clearer. The hatred radiating from her is quite obvious.

Sakisama: “Maika, dear, I was wrong when I called you vermin. You are no mere vermin, no, you aren’t just any insect, no no no no. You are a cockroach through and through and I will squash you beneath my heel even if it will get my stilettos dirty with your intestines.”

Just restraining herself from raising her voice, Sakisama slicks back on her seat and starts to rub her temples, as if she’s dealing with a headache.

Sakisama: “You know, Maika-chan, I was the first one who wanted you to be so much better than how you turned out to be. You were, truly, my first heartbreak in this company. I thought your love could fuel you and give me something to sink my teeth into … but instead, I figure out that it was never there in the first place. It was all superficial. It was all fake.”

Her hands clasp together and reach out … but then they spread apart, like something is being let go from them, or something is disintegrating.

Sakisama: “You are not a creature that can love deeply. And in turn, you deserve to be shown no love nor compassion. The supposed love of your life now conspires alongside a thirty-something who thinks she’s a cute idol and you still seek your singles glory as if there is anything glorious that can be associated with you in the first place.”

The loathing, the joy or anything in-between. They are all gone now. There is only one thing left: business.

Sakisama: “You aren’t Arisa. You aren’t Utami. You couldn’t even live up to the person who I thought you were during my most optimistic.”

The train is slowing down as Sakisama moves to wrap this up.

Sakisama: “Therefore, you will find no salvation nor absolution at my hands. What you will find instead is total annihilation. But it will be yours regardless. So, Maika Style, come and take it, for even destruction is too grand of a gift for you when I’m the one dishing it.”

After her words are over, the train finally stops. With one last gaze to the camera, she shuts it down, with words behind her and only action left in front of her at Last Survivor.