Drink the HAYTERADE 002 - Last Survivor
Posted: Wed Jan 31, 2024 10:36 pm
The Most Powerful Woman in Wrestling, Jamie Hayter, was interviewed with by a reporter with Sports Illustrated. These are the highlights of that interview.
Britt Baker: “I’ve faced Britt Baker before, and I destroyed her. I’ve made it known in the past how much I hate dentists. I told the story on an episode of Monday Night Warfare. I’m quoting exactly what I said when I say this: ‘I went to a dentist’s office to get my wisdom teeth pulled. The dentist was a real sadist. He delighted in torturing his patients. You know, like Dr Isaac Yankem, but for real. He refused to use any form of numbing agent. I felt every nick and cut that he made in my gums. He put stitches into my gums. Did you think he’d prescribe antibiotics? No, because he was a fucking whacko that didn’t believe in medicine. I suffered a serious infection that nearly cost me my life. So, when I healed up, I threw him out the window. When I faced Britt in an official match, and not one that I forced myself into, I took out all of the frustration that I felt toward the dentist on her. If she thought what I did then was bad, then she hasn’t seen anything yet.”
Rhea Ripley: “She’s every bit as powerful as I am. I see a lot of potential in her. She doesn’t have to die like the rest of the company will when Oedo Tai takes it over. So, I want to issue an invitation to her. I want her to join Oedo Tai. Whereas Kairi Sane failed us, I know that Rhea would only aid us. So, my offer stands. I want Rhea Ripley in Oedo Tai, because I see someone that has a lot of potential and I’d hate to see it go to waste.”
Alexa Bliss: “The first person that I ever took out in order to show that Oedo Tai means business. We’ve had our fights. We were participants in the first ever Taipei Deathmatch in the history of EBWF. I have to say that I admire the fact that she went through with such a violent match type, but in the end, the result was how it would’ve been had it been a regular match. Jamie Hayter knocking her head off with the HAYTERADE. Sure, she won War Games for the Rebellious Angels, but if she thinks that Oedo Tai is done, then I’ll take it upon myself to knock her back into reality.”
Surprise Entrants: “It’s no secret the one of them will probably be Torrie Wilson, because she usually shows up for the Last Survivor match. However, I’ve also heard rumblings of a certain someone making their appearance, and it better not be who others think it is.”
Nikki Cross: “So, Becky’s old friend decided to return and join up with Christian Cage. That’s really cute, because their alliance is forfeit when it comes to Oedo Tai. She was a member of Oedo Tai for a very short time nine years ago, but she couldn’t hack it, so Oedo Tai washed its hands of her. It was for the best, because Oedo Tai only wants the best, and Nikki Cross proved that she couldn’t hang then. I’ll prove that she can’t hang now.”
Trish Stratus: “I had fun costing her the EBWF Women’s Championship, and I’ll have even more fun when I dump her arse out of the ring. She likes to parade around like she’s this super alpha bitch. It’s cute, but also stupid, because when I’m around, she’s not an alpha. She’s not even a beta. She’s more at the end of the phonetic alphabet. She’s a zeta. I’ll prove just how out of my league that she is.”
Allysin Kay: “Who?”
Ava Johnson: “Ah, yes. The daughter of the illustrious Dwayne Johnson. The fourth-generation wrestler. I hope she doesn’t expect a free ride, because she’s not getting one. In fact, I’m going to beat her extra stiff just so she gets the point that there are no free rides.”
Tam Nakano: “One of the closest friends that I’ve ever had in this company. Befriending her was very beneficial for me, because she really helped me after Hana Kimura. Outside of me, if any member of Oedo Tai had the best chance of winning, it’d be her.”
Jamie Hayter: “The G.O.A.T.” [said with a wink]
Himeka Arita: “Another good friend of mine. She’s often underrated by people, but I see her as the raw talent that she is. If either Tam or I don’t win, I hope she does.”
Becky Lynch: “I had fun beating her from pillar to post repeatedly. I look forward to doing it once again. What I said about Alexa applies here. Just because the Rebellious Angels won a battle doesn’t mean the war is over. It’s only just begun.”
Liv Morgan: “As I said of Alexa and Becky, I took great pleasure in beating the hell out of her and I look to do that again. The same sentiment applies. If the Rebellious Angels think that Oedo Tai is, then they haven’t seen anything yet.”
Mickie Jamies: “I haven’t had much interaction with her, but she’s nothing more than a statistic, a body for me to throw out as I go on to win the Last Survivor match.”
Utami: “She gave a lot of people a lot of trouble, and I would expect no less at Last Survivor.”
Natalya: “Trish’s running buddy, and best friend. A third-generation wrestler. Is that supposed to impress me? Because it sure as hell doesn’t. She doesn’t need to worry about Becky, because I’m the real danger and if she doesn’t tread lightly, then she can pick up her head in the fifth row.”
In closing: “Outside of my fellow Oedo Tai members, everyone else had better wash their necks and wait.”